5 Ways to Annoy an ESFP
Today we’re going to talk about the charismatic, fun-loving ESFPs! Often referred to as “the Entertainers”, ESFPs live a life full of excitement and optimism. They long to live each moment to the fullest and to bring their infectious enthusiasm to others along the way. They’re sociable, generous, passionate, and full of energy. I have a special place in my heart for ESFPs because I greatly suspect my stepson is one of them – you can’t be around him without picking up on his joy, humor, and authentically warm personality.
Feature photo by Steve Freling of Motor Oomph
Not sure what your personality type is? Take our new personality questionnaire here. Or you can take the official MBTI® here.
So the question is, what annoys these lively personality types? I decided to get online and ask all the ESFPs I could find. Here are the pet peeves that got mentioned again and again:
1 – Planning Ahead
ESFPs live for the now. This gives them an opportunistic intelligence that makes them quick-thinkers in crisis situations or emergencies. But planning for something five years down the road drives them crazy. They want to think about now and let later deal with itself. As ESFP Danielle said, “I hate long term goals. Like. Why can’t we just plan for now and plan for later… Later??”.
2 – Beating Around the Bush
If you’ve got something to say, just say it! And please, don’t dawdle. Along with waiting, ESFPs feel restless and stressed when they have to listen to someone take a long time to get to the point. As ESFP Zdena says; “I hate when people take too long, talk too slow or make dramatic pauses in their speech, where I forget they were speaking. And people who tiptoe around the tulips before saying something. Just spit it out! I haven’t got all day!” Another ESFP, Wendy, echoed Zdena’s remarks when she said “I’m not very patient, I move on to other subjects if a person is taking to long to get to the point. Other pet peeves are long theological discussions, or deep intense matters that make no sense and I could care less about.. “
3 – Micro-Managing
ESFPs like to have their personal freedom to be creative and work without restraints or hovering eyes. Having every moment of their day planned out meticulously is like torture for a free-spirited ESFP. While deadlines are acceptable, as much as possible try to give the ESFP the freedom to meet that deadline in their own way.
4 – Negativity
ESFPs like to see the bright side of life. As I said before, they are natural optimists, with a knack for making the most of each moment. They hate to waste time focusing on the dark side, and while they can be a great listener for your problems, they will eventually tire of the complaining and negativity if it’s continuous or frequent. As ESFP Emily says; “Nothing wears me out more than having to be around negative and judgmental people that love to complain and talk and nitpick about other people because they are unhappy with their own lives and jealous of everyone else’s so they put them down to make themselves feel better. the. worst!”
5 – People Who Chew/Eat/Drink Loudly
ESFPs have dominant Extraverted Sensing (Se), which means that they are incredibly aware of everything happening in their immediate environment. It also means that obnoxious sounds like chewing and slurping and smacking stress them out. Because of this, these normally laid-back types may be sticklers for good table manners!
ESFPs and Stress
Find out more about your personality type in our eBooks, Discovering You: Unlocking the Power of Personality Type, The INFJ – Understanding the Mystic, and The INFP – Understanding the Dreamer. You can also connect with me via Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter!
What Do You Think?
Would you like to share your own pet peeves or experiences? Do you agree or disagree? Let me know in the comments!
Related posts you may enjoy!
10 Things You Should Never Say to an ESFP
How You Use Your Brain – Based On Your Myers-Briggs® Personality Type
Subscribe to Our Newsletter
Want to discover more about personality type? Get the inside scoop with Susan Storm on all things typological, along with special subscriber freebies, and discounts on new eBooks and courses! Join our newsletter today!
One of my dearest friends is an ESFP and I can say that all of these definitely resonate true. As someone who is constantly projecting into the future (ENFP here) and frequently overthinking situations, it’s so refreshing to collide with an ESFP who can keep me grounded in the hear-and-now and help me really live in the moment.
Dani xoxo
Yes! The SP artisans are wonderful for keeping us intuitive types more optimistic and focusing on the current moment-to-moment enjoyments. I’m really glad you enjoyed this post and have a good ESFP friend 🙂
Your info about my fourth child who is an INTP is so welcome. Can you tell me which type of school is best for an INTP because we do not know what is best for him. On one hand he is so clever, on the other hand learning is so difficult. We are afraid school will damage his self-confidence.
Hi Yvonne, while not the author – I felt like I should reply as a serious INTP (in my 40s). I went to a normal public elementary school and I didn’t feel that my self-confidence was damaged. I struggled with the structure of it and some of it was way too easy for me. Those were the downsides. But, I think it kept me grounded since in many ways, that’s life. Sometimes you must comply and as much as I wanted to be a creative and just talk “ideas”, I had to do the day to day work and it went pretty well for me. I was regularly bored, but not enough to make school seem like a bad experience. As a visual learner (not sure if your son is) the book “Upside Down Brilliance” was excellent for me to read as an adult. Explains so much.
OK, all that said – there is a school near me (In southeast Michigan) called Roeper. In this school (it’s expensive), I think I would stretched way farther had I gone there as a kid. I’m told it’s more “student’s choice” in terms of when they attend what they have to and then they can tack on classes that interest them. I struggle with detail and structure STILL – so for me, this kind of learning would have been fantastic.I realize that you probably don’t live in Michigan, but I thought that mentioning it (and the book) may give you some information you’re looking for.
As an ESFP, I don’t find negativity annoying. When my people complain, I recognize the reason for it. I get annoyed with the thing that caused someone pain or discomfort or frustration, I don’t judge the complainer! Complaining to to a friend can be incredibly helpful to the process of making things better.
That is so true!!! I can so relate to that!
Oh, yes. I do agree with you. Your analysis is so true.
I have friends who talk about all kinds of utopian ideas that although would be nice are to me a ridiculous snooze fest – bicycle lanes on the freeway automated robot cars with no drivers – OK this is all coming I want to go to yosemite and hug a tree ZZZZZzzzzz