Here’s Why Each Myers-Briggs® Personality Type is Mad at You

The silent treatment. Ghosting. An unexpected “friend breakup.”

Have you ever found yourself stuck in an endless loop of, “What did I do to make that person dislike me?”

Your texts are met with the digital equivalent of tumbleweeds, your calls echo into oblivion and no one’s sliding into your DMs anymore. And you’re left scratching your head, wondering if you’ve unknowingly committed some grave social faux pas. Well, fear not! We’re about to embark on a lighthearted journey into the land of Myers-Briggs personality types that’ll help you understand why each type might be mad at you. Remember, don’t take this too seriously – we’re just hoping to give you a little laughter in the midst of your pain.

Not sure what your personality type is? Take our in-depth personality questionnaire here. Or you can take the official MBTI® here.

Here’s Why Every Myers-Briggs® Personality Type is Mad At You

Estimated reading time: 21 minutes

Why the ISTJ is Mad at You:

Okay, so here’s the deal with the ISTJ. They’re the steadfast, reliable ones who probably haven’t told you how they feel since the last lunar eclipse. But that one time when they did open up to you, what did you do? You checked your phone. Yup, in the middle of their rare emotional vulnerability, your phone buzzed, you picked it up, and like a moth drawn to a flame, you just had to show them that cat falling off the counter. Or, even worse, you took their moment of vulnerability to pivot the conversation back to your favorite topic: you. The second they mentioned feeling stressed, you jumped in with how your stress is obviously bigger and badder. Congratulations, you just made an ISTJ hold a grudge.

Here are a few more reasons why the ISTJ might be giving you the cold shoulder:

• You changed plans last minute. ISTJs treat their plans like sacred scripts, and you just threw in an unexpected plot twist.
• You borrowed their favorite pen… and didn’t return it. There’s great unrest in the ISTJ kingdom now.
• You arrived late to your meeting. Time is an ISTJ’s loyal companion, and you, my friend, have been disloyal.
• You don’t follow the rules in board games. Who does that anyway?

Find out more about ISTJs: 10 Things That Excite the ISTJ Personality Type

Why the ISFJ is Mad at You:

Now let’s talk about the ISFJs. The nurturing, sensitive healers, who care about your feelings more than their own. They’re the ones who remember your birthday without Facebook reminders, and always have a sympathetic ear when you’re feeling down. But guess what? They’re peeved. Why? Because you’ve been treating their kindness like an all-you-can-eat buffet, and now they’re fresh out of offerings.

Here’s why your favorite ISFJ might be giving you the silent treatment:

• You forgot their birthday. They remember yours, even your half-birthday. But you couldn’t even be bothered to set a reminder in your phone. Shame on you.
• You were rude to the fast food employee: ISFJs are all about treating people with respect, even if they’re just serving you a burger. You yelling at the cashier was a moment they’ve been trying to mentally erase for months.
• You’ve been inconsiderate. Like that time you asked them to drop everything and help you move, but ‘forgot’ to return the favor.
• You keep breaking promises. If the ISFJ had a dollar for every broken promise, they’d own the moon by now.
• You’re a drama queen. ISFJs have a low tolerance for unnecessary drama. You’re not starring in a reality TV show, so please, stop with the daily cliffhangers.

Find out more about ISFJs: 10 Fictional ISFJ Characters

Why the ISTP is Mad at You:

Now, onto the ISTPs. The cool, collected “Vigilantes” of the MBTI world. They are the ones who stay calm in a crisis and can fix just about anything – except maybe their patience for your driving. Yup, you heard it right – your driving. You thought it was a casual Sunday drive, but for them, it was a slow crawl through Dante’s ninth circle of hell. You see, ISTPs are all about efficiency, and your scenic detour in the left lane was anything but.

Here are some other reasons why the ISTP might be giving you the death glare:

• You drove slow in the left lane. ISTPs consider this a capital offense. To them, it’s like using a smartphone to hammer a nail. It’s not just about the inefficiency, it’s about the principle of the thing.
• You’re too clingy. Clingy people are to ISTPs what garlic is to vampires – repelling.
• You micromanage their time. ISTPs are fiercely independent. They don’t need you to manage their time. They’ve got this.
• You complain too much. Having an occasional vent is one thing, but constant whining? That’s a one-way ticket to ISTP-Ignore-ville.
• You overreact emotionally. ISTPs aren’t big on emotional drama. Save your theatrics for the stage.

Find out more about ISTPs: Are ISTP Personalities Rare? A Closer Look

Why the ISFP is Mad at You:

Let’s dive into the world of ISFPs, shall we? They’re the kind, creative souls who are as hard to catch as a butterfly in a net. The minute you think you’ve figured them out, they surprise you with yet another layer of their multifaceted personality. They’re like those Russian nesting dolls, except each doll is a different, unexpected shape. So, why is this artistic, free spirit mad at you? Because you, in all your infinite wisdom, decided to give them a ‘How to Socialize for Dummies’ lecture.

Maybe you thought their clothes were too “odd”

Maybe you thought their hair should be more traditional

Perhaps you thought they should “smile more”

Well, that probably backfired. They may not have caused a big scene and screamed your head off; but they’re probably locked up in their art studio painting a portrait of you being chased by a swarm of bees.

Here are a few more reasons why the enigmatic ISFP is giving you the silent treatment:

• You tried to put them in a box: ISFPs are like water – they’re fluid, adaptable, and can’t be contained. Your attempts at classification were as productive as trying to catch a cloud with a butterfly net.
• You got them to open up: This was a rare gem, a moment of vulnerability that they don’t share with just anyone. But what did you do? You had to one-up them. Now they’ve added you to their ‘Do Not Open Up To’ list.
• You were two-faced: ISFPs are all about authenticity. They don’t have the time or energy to deal with fake people, and you’ve just revealed your true colors.
• You criticized their creative expression: This is a big no-no. Their creativity is an extension of their soul. By criticizing it, you criticized them. So, next time, instead of offering unwelcome critique, just appreciate the effort they put into their creativity.

Find out more about ISFPs: 10 Things You Should Never Say to an ISFP

Why the INTJ is Mad at You:

Oh boy, the INTJ. The strategic, independent, and highly contemplative mastermind. They’ve probably planned their next five years down to the minute, and here you are, messing up their meticulously planned schedule by signing them up for—brace yourself—a social event. Not just any social event, oh no, you’ve put them in the middle of the social equivalent of a mosh pit, helping out at a wedding or, God forbid, being the greeter at a party. You might as well have signed them up for a tooth extraction without anesthesia.

Here’s why your beloved INTJ may be plotting your untimely demise:

• You forced them into a social event: INTJs aren’t antisocial—they’re selectively social. Your little surprise has all the appeal of a surprise root canal.
• You disregarded their personal space: INTJs value their solitude. Now, instead of enjoying a quiet evening with their latest non-fiction book, they’re stuck in an endless barrage of small talk.
• You wasted their time: To an INTJ, time is more valuable than gold. It’s like you just asked them to burn a pile of cash.
• You are two-faced: INTJs have zero tolerance for fake people. If they detect any hint of inauthenticity, consider yourself on their blacklist.

Find out more about INTJs: 12 Awkward Moments INTJs Absolutely Hate

Why the INFJ is Mad at You:

Entering the world of INFJs is akin to stepping into a labyrinth filled with profound wisdom, deep empathy, and a hearty helping of existential dread. So why, you ask, is this kind-hearted, insightful soul mad at you? Well, it’s because you did the equivalent of laughing at a professor during a lecture – you chuckled when they shared an insight with you…you might have even rolled.your.eyes!! They could have told you the meaning of life, but you shrugged it off like they were reading a horoscope.

Here’s why your neighborhood INFJ is contemplating whether they should ghost you or just send you a long, well-thought-out email explaining everything that’s wrong with your relationship:

• You laughed at their insight: When an INFJ shares their insights, it’s like they’re opening a secret window into their soul. Your laughter might as well have been a slap in the face.
• You don’t take them seriously: They’re not philosophers for fun, you know. They spend hours, days, even weeks, ruminating over the mysteries of the universe, and you casually dismiss their thoughts as whimsical musings.
• You’re too shallow: For an INFJ, small talk is fine as long as it leads to something deeper in the end. But if you never get past surface-level conversations, they’ll quickly lose interest.
• You’re self-centered: INFJs are naturally empathetic and caring, but they can’t stand it when people only ever talk about themselves. Remember, conversations are a two-way street.
• You brought too much drama: INFJs crave peace and harmony. They’re like tranquil lakes, and you, my friend, have been creating ripples.

Find out more about INFJs: The Two Warring Sides of the INFJ Personality Type

Why the INTP is Mad at You:

Welcome to the world of INTPs, where logic reigns supreme and every sentence is a carefully constructed argument. So, why is this heady intellectual ready to un-friend you? Well, you somehow managed to make a mockery of rational discussion by dumping a bag of logical fallacies into the conversation, and then had the audacity to barrel forward with willful ignorance. Congratulations! You’ve managed to become the human embodiment of nails on a chalkboard to an INTP.

Here’s a rundown of why your INTP comrade might just be plotting to replace you with an AI:

• You ignored sound reasoning: The INTP spent hours, possibly days, methodically crafting a logical argument, and you skipped over it like a flat stone on a pond. You might as well have spat on their dissertation.
• You forced them into social gatherings: For an INTP, forced social interaction is akin to a surprise exam on a subject they didn’t study for. Awkward pauses, small talk, the nerve-wracking game of ‘will they or won’t they shake hands’—you just booked them a one-way ticket to Discomfort Town.
• You interrupted them: An INTP talking is a rare sight to behold, like spotting a unicorn in the wild. But then, you did the conversational equivalent of a photobomber—you interrupted their monologue. You broke their train of thought and they’ve probably spent the last hour trying to find their way back.
• You micro-managed them: INTPs value their independence and autonomy. They are like cats—you can provide the framework (read: the cozy cat bed), but let them choose their own course of action.

Find out more about INTPs: Are INTPs Rare? The Truth About the Prodigy

Why the INFP is Mad at You:

Welcome to the INFP’s world, a place where imagination and personal conviction reign supreme. This dreamer has a heart as soft as marshmallows roasting over an open flame at a friendly campfire. But now, they’re fuming at you. Why? Well, you committed the cardinal sin of being two-faced. You gossiped about a mutual friend and then acted all nice to their face. To the INFP, you might as well have morphed into the Big Bad Wolf huffing and puffing at their fragile house of trust.

Here’s a rundown of why the INFP, your previously friendly neighborhood dreamer, is now seriously considering turning their daydreams into a dystopian nightmare for you:

• You were two-faced: INFPs value authenticity above all. Your Jekyll and Hyde act with the mutual friend? It’s like you took a sledgehammer to the statue of Authenticity in their mental town square.
• You lack values: For an INFP, not having values is like a sandwich without bread, a book without words, a… well, you get the point. It’s just wrong.
• You made fun of their quirky passions: To an INFP, their passion is sacred. You ridiculing it is akin to you playing a cruel prank on their favorite, most sensitive imaginary friend.
• You mocked the underdogs: INFPs are the champions of the underdogs, their knights in shining armor. You making fun of them is like you trying to slay their sacred dragon.
• You abused your power: INFPs aspire to a world of balance and fairness. There’s no room for power-mongers with them.
• You tried to define them: Telling an INFP who they “should” be is like telling a bird it should ignore the sky. They value their individuality, and you trying to dictate their identity is a surefire way to make them see you as the villain in their story.

Find out more about INFPs: The INFP Cognitive Functions In-Depth

Why the ESTJ is Mad at You:

Say hello to the ESTJ, the natural leader, the CEO of Getting Stuff Done. This is a personality type that values efficiency, punctuality, and responsibility above all else. So, you decided to give them a self-righteous, “do better” speech because you disagreed with some of their values or life goals? Well, congratulations! You’ve managed to awaken the sleeping dragon. Here’s the tea on why your ESTJ boss, friend, or loved one is ready to send you to an intensive workshop on “How Not To Annoy The Living Daylights Out Of A Responsible, Hardworking Individual”:

• You labeled them as “mean”: Bluntness is not mean, it’s efficient! Why beat around the bush when you can just say it as it is?
• You turned into a sensitivity minefield: ESTJs, like anyone else, understand the need for sensitivity. But if they have to tiptoe around you like a cat on a hot tin roof every time they speak, then Houston, we have a problem.
• You shirked personal responsibility: Congratulations! By blaming everyone but yourself for your problems, you’ve just signed up for the ESTJ’s unofficial “Grow Up and Take Some Responsibility” program.
• You were late… again: For ESTJs, punctuality is not a virtue, it’s a law. Being constantly late is like turning up to court without your pants. It’s not just embarrassing, it’s downright disrespectful.

Find out more about ESTJs: 24 Signs That You’re an ESTJ, the Captain Personality Type

Why the ESFJ is Mad at You:

Meet the ESFJ, the personality type that strives to always be the “Friend of the Year”. They’re the ones who greet you with a warm smile, offer a shoulder to cry on, and are always ready to jump into the trenches with you during your personal soap opera. But hold up, why are they mad at you? Well, it seems you’ve been treating them like a free subscription to a 24/7 emotional support hotline. They’ve finally realized that you’ve been using them like an emotional vampire. You, my friend, have overstayed your welcome in the land of the always caring, always there ESFJs. Here’s a list of your egregious crimes:

• You were rude to a family member: The ESFJ’s family is their pride and joy, their fortress of comfort. Your rudeness to them is like you spray-painted graffiti on their cherished family portrait.
• You disrespected their things: ESFJs take care of their belongings like a librarian takes care of books. Respect their stuff, or else.
• You called their traditions silly: Oh, you dared to mock the annual Christmas Eve ‘ugly holiday sweater’ party? That’s the same as calling mom’s homemade apple pie ‘just okay.’ It’s a sacrilege that not even the strongest of friendships can bear.
• You were insensitive to their feelings: ESFJs wear their hearts on their sleeves. Don’t use their emotions as a dartboard for your condescension or criticism.
• You troll people: ESFJs will preserve the harmony like a captain protects his ship. Don’t upset it for no reason.

Find out more about ESFJs: The Top 7 Gift Ideas for ESFJs

Why the ESTP is Mad at You:

Well, well, well, look who decided to join us, the ESTP, the adrenaline junkie of the Myers-Briggs® world. They’re the ones finding the biggest waves to surf, the smartest stocks to buy, and the spiciest foods to eat. Now, they’re mad at you. Not just mad, they’re fuming, sizzling, boiling. Why? Because you, my friend, decided to boss them around like they are the youngest sibling and you’re the know-it-all, condescending elder sister. Congratulations! You’ve managed to ruffle the feathers of the free bird. Let’s dissect your missteps:

• You played the boss: ESTPs are not your personal soldiers to command. Yes, they do enjoy a good challenge, but your micromanagement is like putting a leash on a wild mustang. It just doesn’t sit well.
• You’re all talk, no action: ESTPs are doers, not dreamers. Every time you ramble on about your plans without an iota of action, they feel their skin crawl with irritation.
• You get offended too easily: With their blunt and straightforward nature, ESTPs can’t comprehend your knack for finding offense in every little thing. It’s like trying to walk barefoot in a bedroom littered with Lego bricks.
• You’re overly critical of them: Criticism is to be expected, but your constant nagging is like a mosquito buzzing in their ear at 3 AM. It’s not constructive, it’s just annoying.
• You judged their idea of fun: So they like to skydive, spontaneously embark on a weekend road trip, or participate in a hot chili eating contest. To you, it’s immature; to them, it’s living.

Discover more about ESTPs: The Top 7 Gift Ideas for ESTPs

Why the ESFP is Mad at You:

Uh oh, the ESFP is mad at you, and it’s not because you refused to join their karaoke duet at the office party. No, it’s because you had the audacity to dismiss them as ‘just the fun ones’. Whenever they’re trying to rally people together for a good time, you’ve got something slightly patronizing to say that makes their efforts look childish or insignificant. News flash: they’ve got layers, like a deliciously complex seven-layer dip, or a particularly engaging piece of avant-garde theatre. Let’s look at precisely how you’ve managed to transform their merry laughter into an annoyed eye roll:

• You called their fun ‘shallow’: Okay, so their idea of fun doesn’t involve contemplating the meaning of life in a dimly lit, pretentious coffee shop. So what? Life is about living, not just analyzing.
• You mocked the underdogs: ESFPs are huge softies for the underdogs. To them, your derision is like laughing at a baby’s first steps. It’s heartless, and it’s a one-way ticket to the ESFP’s naughty list.
• You were two-faced: ESFPs are genuine. Your two-faced behavior is like finding an empty fortune cookie. It’s disappointing, and it leaves a bad taste.
• You don’t stand for anything: If you’re merely going with the flow without any real conviction, then we have a problem. To an ESFP, your lack of standing for anything is as irritating as a song stuck on repeat. It’s monotonous, and it’s dull.
• You underestimated their depth: Yes, they’re passionate. Yes, they’re spontaneous. But that doesn’t mean they are void of depth.

Discover more about ESFPs: Understanding ESFP Sensing

Why the ENTJ is Mad at You:

Oh, there you are! Hiding from the wrath of the ENTJ, are we? These types are the strategic directors of the Myers-Briggs® realm, always scanning the horizon for the next mountain to scale, the next battle to win, the next empire to conquer. And you’ve got the nerve to wag your finger at them, admonishing them for their workaholic tendencies, as though they’re some misguided hamster that’s forgotten how to escape its spinning wheel. Newsflash: they’re not in the wheel, they’re building the wheel, the cage, and the entire pet store while you’re still debating the ethics of hamster wheels in general. But, in case you need further proof of your missteps, let’s break down just why the ENTJ is steaming mad at you:

• You don’t follow through on what you say you’ll do: The ENTJ is a person of action. Promising them something and then not delivering is like promising a dog a walk and then locking it in a laundry room. It’s not just disappointing, it’s cruel.
• You don’t have any convictions: ENTJs respect people who stand their ground and believe in something.
• You only do small talk: ENTJs have little patience for chit-chat about the weather or the details of your morning drive. If the conversation isn’t going to get into more meaningful or practical territory, they’ll check out.
• You’re perpetually offended: ENTJs are blunt, straightforward, and have little patience for tip-toeing around people’s feelings. Your constant sensitivity is like trying to assemble IKEA furniture in a sandstorm. It’s frustrating, and painful.
• You’re all talk and no action: ENTJs respect those who walk their talk. Your endless rhetoric without concrete action is like a fireworks show where all the rockets fail to launch. It’s underwhelming, and it’s a total letdown.

Want to know more about ENTJs? 24 Signs That You’re an ENTJ, the Director Personality Type

Why the ENFJ is Mad at You:

So, you managed to upset the ENFJ, huh? How? They’re the friendly visionaries of the Myers-Briggs® world, always out there trying to make the world a better place, like a one-person UN peacekeeping mission with a side order of Oprah. And you, my friend, have just told them that their expressiveness and desire to help others is “a bit much,” as though they’re an over-eager Golden Retriever puppy that’s friendliness is ruining your day. Let’s see how you managed to transform their sunny disposition into a full-blown tempest:

• You got too judgy: ENFJs are always curious about peoples values and what they stand for. When you jump into the judges chair too quickly, it’s like you’ve ruined their chance to find out who someone is and what they believe in.
• You showed no empathy: ENFJs are empathetic to their core. When you lack empathy and create ripples of tension as a result, the ENFJ is going to respond with all cylinders firing.
• You disrespected their values: ENFJs are people of principle who take their ethics very seriously. Tread with caution.
• You don’t appreciate their help: ENFJs try their best to take care of the people they love. When you don’t appreciate their efforts, it’s like a slap in the face.
• You misjudged their need for harmony: Yes, they want everyone to get along. No, it doesn’t mean they are weak or can’t handle conflict.

Curious about ENFJs? The ENFJ Personality and the Enneagram

Why the ENFP is Mad at You:

Congratulations! You’ve managed to anger the ENFP, the lovable and imaginative enthusiast of the Myers-Briggs® world. They are the passionate crusaders, the dreamy idealists, and the champions of creativity, love, and freedom. And you’ve just told them to “be more realistic” as though they’re a child who needs to stop believing in Santa. Here’s how you’ve managed to take their rainbow-colored world and turn it into fifty shades of gray (and not in a good way):

• You squashed their dreams: Dismissing an ENFP’s dreams is like telling a bird to stop flying. It’s unnatural and it’s soul-crushing.
• You didn’t value their uniqueness: The ENFP is proud of their individuality. If you’ve made them feel like they have to conform to fit in, then you’ve effectively squashed their spirit.
• You were overly critical: ENFPs can’t stand criticism that isn’t constructive. If you’ve been too harsh and haven’t given them room to express themselves, they may not want anything more to do with you.
• You didn’t take them seriously: ENFPs are fun-loving, but that doesn’t mean they’re frivolous. They have serious thoughts and ideas, and they want to be taken seriously.
• You imposed too many rules: To an ENFP, too many rules feel like a prison. They need the freedom to explore, create, and dream. Your inflexibility is as stifling as a straightjacket.

Interested in learning more about ENFPs? The Courage of the ENFP Personality Type

Why the ENTP is Mad at You:

Well done, you’ve managed to tick off an ENTP, the clever innovators of the Myers-Briggs® kingdom. These individuals are the witty, fast-talking idea-generators who are as comfortable debating Camus as they are explaining why PCs are better than Macs, and, oddly, vice versa. And now they’re upset because you’ve told them to “stop arguing so much,” as if they’re a high school debate team captain that can’t quit yelling about the merits of universal healthcare at family dinners. Let’s dissect the ways you’ve managed to make their inventive minds spin with irritation:

• You didn’t appreciate their wit: Not laughing at an ENTP’s jokes is a surefire way to kill an ENTP’s mood.
• You mistook their debate for a mean-spirited conflict: ENTPs love a good debate. They can passionately argue a case, then effortlessly switch sides. If you’ve mistaken this for stubborn contrarianism, you’ve missed the point entirely.
• You stifled their creativity: ENTPs are innovation machines. If you’ve tried to box them into tradition and routine, it’s like trying to make a shark live in a goldfish bowl. It’s not going to work.
• You enforced too many rules: ENTPs thrive on flexibility and the freedom to explore different possibilities. If you’re rigid with rules and refuse to give them room to innovate, they’ll feel suffocated in your presence.
• You didn’t engage in intellectual conversation: ENTPs enjoy intellectual stimulation. If you’re not up for a thought-provoking discussion, it’s like inviting a bibliophile into a library and telling them they can’t read any books. It’s deeply unsatisfying.

Find out more about ENTPs: 10 Amazing ENTP Anime Characters

What Are Your Thoughts?

Do you have any interesting stories about how these personality types have ticked you off? Maybe you’re one of these personality types and you’re itching to set the record straight. We’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences. Drop a comment below and join the conversation!

Find out more about your personality type in our eBooks, Discovering You: Unlocking the Power of Personality Type,  The INFJ – Understanding the Mystic, The INTJ – Understanding the Strategist, and The INFP – Understanding the Dreamer. You can also connect with me via Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter!

References:

MBTI® Manual – A Guide to the Development and Use of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator® Instrument by Isabel Briggs -Myers, Mary H. McCaulley, Naomi L. Quenk, and Allen L. Hammer (CPP, Inc. 2003)

The Art of Speed Reading People by Paul D. Tieger & Barbara Barron-Tieger (Little, Brown and Company, 1998)

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