How Each Myers-Briggs® Personality Type Feels About Compliments

Compliments can be a tricky subject. Some of us love them, basking in the warm glow of praise, while others might squirm uncomfortably, unsure of how to respond or even suspicious of the compliment’s sincerity.

As an MBTI® practitioner, I’ve always found it fascinating how different personality types respond to compliments, and recently, I conducted a survey of over 1,500 people to see how each type gives and receives love. In the survey, I asked the question, “How do you feel about compliments?” and respondents could choose from:
– I love them!
– I like them most of the time
– I’m unsure/it depends
– I’m skeptical of compliments in general
– I don’t like them

Ready to dive into the data? Let’s begin!

How Each Myers-Briggs® Personality Type Feels About Compliments

#1 – The ESTJ

ESTJ “Captains” are the types who loved compliments the most, with 89.47% admitting that they either love or mostly like compliments. These hard-working, responsible types tend to push themselves to great lengths to accomplish goals, protect their loved ones, and stay on task. Due to their brusque exterior, many people shy away from being “touchy feely” or or overly expressive with them. Sadly, this can be a mistake. ESTJs love to hear that their hard work is making an impact, and a genuine compliment is deeply appealing them. Just don’t expect them to go out of their way to fish for one!

#2 – The ENFP

70.27% of ENFPs said they either loved or mostly liked compliments. “I spend so much of my time encouraging others that I’m forced into a role,” one ENFP admitted, “it’s nice to be encouraged and uplifted by someone else instead of always having to do it myself.”

While most ENFPs do love a good compliment, 10.81% said they were suspicious of compliments in general. The key is to not shower an ENFP with compliments when you want something in return. Any kind of manipulation or insincerity is a major turn-off to this type. Words of affirmation, one of the five love languages, ranked as the second most common love language for this personality type.

#3 – The ISFJ

Warm and gentle, ISFJs tend to do a lot behind the scenes for other people. Their quiet, soft-spoken nature means that many of their efforts aren’t in the limelight. In fact, I’ve spoken to many ISFJs who talk about their hard work being commandeered by other, more assertive personality types, and the ISFJ getting little to no recognition. Perhaps this is why compliments mean such a great deal to this type. 69.05% said that they loved or mostly liked compliments, with only 7.14% feeling suspicious of them. Feeling acknowledged and appreciated is so important for ISFJs, and unsurprisingly, words of affirmation took the top spot as their primary love language.

#4 – The ESFP

Enthusiastic and adventurous, ESFPs are known to bring the party to any social situation. People count on them for their charisma, humor, and sense of fun. But sometimes this becomes all people expect from ESFPs, and when an ESFP is having a bad day everyone acts like the sun just fell from the sky. As much as ESFPs give encouragement, they also need encouragement and appreciation from their friends. 66.66% of ESFPs either love or mostly like compliments, while 22.22% said that it depended on the situation and person giving the compliment.

With this information, it makes sense that the ESFP’s top love language is “Words of Affirmation.” If you care about an ESFP and really want to make an impact, give specific compliments about things they’ve done to make your life better. But, as with the ENFP, make sure that you’re being genuine. Don’t “give to get” or twist the compliment as a means to manipulate them into doing something you want. 11.11% of ESFPs are suspicious of compliments, so make sure you’re checking your own intentions for any ulterior motives.

#5 – The ESFJ

64.70% of ESFJs love or mostly like compliments, and only 5.88% are suspicious of them. ESFJs are often the ones organizing social events, coordinating everyone’s schedules, and making sure everyone is happy. But sometimes they feel taken for granted or unappreciated in these roles. A genuine compliment can go a long way to let them know that you see them, their efforts, and their genuine desire to help others.

#6 – The ENFJ

61.91% of ENFJs love or mostly like compliments, and only 4.76% were suspicious of them. “Words of affirmation is my top love language,” one ENFJ commented, “it just lets me feel like you actually notice and pay attention.”

ENFJs love to help people, and they’re naturally empathetic and attuned to the needs of others. It can be easy for others to see them as a mentor, guide, or even personal therapist. But sometimes this results in one-way relationships where the ENFJ is doing the bulk of the emotional labor and the other party is more than happy to take. Genuine compliments help the ENFJ to feel appreciated for their efforts and acknowledged for the support that they give.

Find out more about ENFJs: 10 Must-Read Books for ENFJs

#7 – The ESTP

49.68% of ESTPs love or mostly like compliments, while 33.33% said they were unsure or it depended on the situation. These Daredevils love positive interactions with other people, competition, fixing things. Recognition for their wins or their helpfulness matters to them, but it needs to be genuine. Anything that feels obligatory is a turn-off, and 11.11% of ESTPs said they were suspicious of compliments in general. If you want to compliment an ESTP, make sure it’s specific, authentic, and don’t overdo it.

#8 – The INFP

Words of affirmation was the second-most likely love language for INFPs, so it makes sense that 48.59% of them love or mostly like compliments. These Dreamers can sometimes feel like they’re in the background of people’s lives, doing work behind the scenes, listening, and being a supporter. They are rarely in the limelight, but a genuine compliment can make them feel like they are truly seen and acknowledged. However, 13.08% of INFPs said they were suspicious of compliments in general, so make sure it’s genuine and not just flattery.

#9 – The ISFP

46.88% of ISFPs said they love or mostly like compliments, but 18.75% were suspicious of them. “I hate flattery,” one ISFP commented, “and sometimes compliments make me feel wary, but with people I’m really close to I love them.” ISFPs are often creative, artistic, and quiet people who can sometimes feel misunderstood or overlooked. So genuine compliments that acknowledge their unique talents and contributions can mean a lot to them.

Discover more about ISFPs: Why ISFPs Struggle with Loneliness, and How to Cope

#10 – The INFJ

45.92% of INFJs love or mostly like compliments, yet 24.49% are suspicious of them in general. Empathetic and insightful, these types tend to give compliments freely, but when receiving them they’re quick to sniff out any sense of inauthenticity.

“I like it when someone shows appreciation for what I do,” one INFJ commented, “a lot of times that doesn’t happen.” Another INFJ stated, “I feel like a lot of my work is invisible, especially as an INFJ mother. People just think ‘of course she’s going to do that, she’s the mom.’ But I go above and beyond in all my relationships so any time someone says ‘Hey, I saw that’ I feel really affirmed.”

Discover more about INFJs: The INFJ and the 9 Enneagram Types

#11 – The ENTP

41.66% of ENTPs love or mostly like compliments, yet 16.67% are suspicious of them, and 41.67% said they were unsure or it depended on the situation.

Skeptical by nature, it makes sense that ENTPs would approach compliments with a touch of wariness. These types love radical honesty and hate anything that seems fake or manipulative. “Usually someone gives me a compliment when they want me to do something for them,” one ENTP said, “like thanks, but you didn’t have to tell me you liked my shoes to ask me to fix your computer.” So keep in mind, when approaching an ENTP with a request, be direct. When giving them a compliment, make sure you don’t have any ulterior motives in mind.

Find out more about ENTPs: 12 Amazing Fictional ENTP Characters

#12 – The INTP

When it came to the Prodigies of the type world, there was a lot of variety in their responses. 39.13% of them loved or mostly liked compliments, while 23.91% were suspicious of them. “I don’t like compliments that feel fake or insincere,” one INTP explained, “so if someone gives me a compliment, I want them to mean it.” Another INTP commented, “I don’t always know how to respond to compliments because they make me feel uncomfortable. But at the same time, they do make me feel good and appreciated.”

Find out more about INTPs: The Dark Side of the INTP Personality Type

#13 – The ISTJ

38.46% of ISTJs loved or mostly liked compliments, but 20.51% were suspicious of them, and 38.46% said they were unsure or it depended on the situation. These types are reliable and responsible, and tend to do a lot of work to make life easier. But sometimes they can feel like their efforts go unnoticed or unappreciated. Genuine compliments that acknowledge their dedication and achievements can go a long way to make them feel valued. Just make sure not to overdo it, ISTJs hate being put on the spot and tend to feel uncomfortable with flattery.

Discover more about ISTJs: 10 Things You Crave Every Day as an ISTJ Personality Type

#14 – The ISTP

32.14% of ISTPs love or mostly like compliments, while 21.43% were suspicious of them, and 39.29% were unsure of how they felt or said it depended on the situation. 7.14% of ISTPs said they outright didn’t like compliments. One commented, “I appreciate the intention, but it does feel awkward.”

Independent and self-sufficient, ISTPs aren’t driven by a desire for praise, but it can feel good if it’s genuine. However, they tend to be private people who don’t like a lot of attention, so too many compliments or public displays of appreciation may make them uncomfortable.

#15 – The ENTJ

ENTJs believe that actions speak louder than words, which could explain why only 30.77% of them love or mostly like compliments. Surprisingly, 30.77% of ENTJs said they don’t like compliments, and 7.69% said they were suspicious of them. “I don’t need words to feel good about myself,” one ENTJ stated,” and another said, “I don’t hate them, and a few times I’ve even liked them, but sometimes they make me cringe because it just seems off-topic or irrelevant.”

Find out more about ENTJs: 24 Signs That You’re an ENTJ, the Director Personality Type

#16 – The INTJ

30.43% of INTJs loved or mostly liked compliments, while 32.97% were suspicious of them and 8.79% said they didn’t like them at all. Being put on the spot and recognized with a compliment can feel uncomfortable to INTJs. It can also catch them off guard, because often they feel skeptical of wordy or effusive expressions of admiration. “I actually love compliments from specific people,” one INTJ said, “but it’s the people I know and trust really well. Sometimes I feel awkward or self-conscious when people I don’t know well compliment me.”

Does this mean you should never compliment an INTJ? Absolutely not! Some still love compliments, and others will appreciate a genuine sign of appreciation. But don’t give compliments in an obligatory or manipulative way and don’t be surprised if they politely brush off the compliment and return conversation to a relevant matter at hand.

Find out more about INTJs: The 10 Best Careers for INTJs

What Do You Think?

How do you feel about compliments? Do you have any unique perspectives or personal stories to share? Let us know in the comments!

Find out more about your personality type in our eBooks, Discovering You: Unlocking the Power of Personality Type,  The INFJ – Understanding the Mystic, The INTJ – Understanding the Strategist, and The INFP – Understanding the Dreamer. You can also connect with me via Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter!