Relationships are complicated. Whether you’re trying to decode your partner’s cryptic texts, wondering why your best friend suddenly needs alone time, or attempting to survive a holiday dinner with your in-laws, personality differences play a massive role in how we connect (or clash). That’s where the Myers-Briggs® and Enneagram come in—your ultimate cheat codes for understanding love, friendship, and family dynamics. Here, you’ll find deep dives into how different types communicate, what they need in relationships, and why your INFJ spouse keeps overanalyzing that one thing you said three days ago. Whether you want to strengthen your bond, navigate conflict, or just make sense of the people in your life, you’re in the right place.
The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator® (MBTI®) is like a roadmap to how people think, feel, and interact with the world. It breaks personalities down into 16 distinct types, each with its own way of communicating, handling emotions, and approaching relationships. Some types thrive on deep, meaningful conversations (hello, INFJs and INFPs), while others prefer action over words (looking at you, ESTPs and ISTPs). Understanding these differences can be a game-changer in relationships—helping you avoid unnecessary conflicts, build stronger connections, and finally understand why your INTJ partner gives you solutions when all you wanted was empathy. Whether you’re navigating romance, friendship, or family bonds, knowing your MBTI type (and theirs) can transform the way you connect.
One of the questions I’m asked a lot as an MBTI® practitioner is what the best personality type matches are in relationships. While I think any type can excel in a relationship with any other type, I’m frequently coming across couples made up of opposite personality types. It’s like we’re all looking for a certain…
Today we’re going to explore the ideal dating experiences of each personality type. Whether you’re asking someone out for the first time or you’re celebrating your 50th anniversary, these tips can improve the quality of your dating experiences! Not sure what your personality type is? Take our new personality questionnaire! Tips to Remember When Dating…
I’m going to be real with you. It’s hard to find your ‘Village.’ For some people, finding community comes naturally. You live in one place your whole life, have a close-knit family, a friend group, religious group, institutions and traditions and social circles that you can count on no matter what. For others, life feels…
Ever felt like you needed a way out of a relationship, but you weren’t sure how to tactfully broach the subject? That’s where today’s article comes in! We’re throwing tact out the window (along with any semblance of seriousness), and diving straight into the bizarre world of personality types. Picture this: You’ve been dating an…
Do you and your partner feel like you’re speaking different languages? Does it seem like you keep rehashing the same arguments again and again? Maybe your way of showing love isn’t the way your partner is accepting it. Maybe the way they want to receive love isn’t the way you naturally provide it. Relationships are…
When it comes to relationships, almost none are as challenging (or as beautiful) as long-distance relationships. Though they will never be the easiest, research shows that people in long-distance relationships have a strong chance at thriving. “Most studies have found equal or even higher levels of satisfaction, commitment, and trust in (long-distance dating relationships) compared…
Ever wondered what your significant other really fears in your relationship? Today we’re looking at some of the biggest underlying anxieties each type faces when they enter the dating scene. Knowing these fears can help you to be considerate of your partner’s headspace and individual needs. I’ve also included some infographics to help you be…
Does your Myers-Briggs® personality type impact your marriage? Do you ever feel like your partner just doesn’t “get” you or you don’t understand them? Today we’re going to take a look at some of the most frequent problems that occur in relationships between different types. Because this could get extremely complex we’re going to start…
The Enneagram isn’t just a personality system—it’s a deep dive into why we do what we do. Unlike Myers-Briggs, which focuses on how we think, the Enneagram digs into our core fears, motivations, and emotional triggers. With nine types, each shaped by a unique internal drive, it explains why Type 2s bend over backward to help (but secretly want appreciation), why Type 5s guard their energy like a dragon hoarding gold, and why Type 9s would rather keep the peace than start an argument (even when they should). In relationships, knowing your Enneagram type—and your partner’s—can reveal hidden dynamics, prevent miscommunication, and help you grow together instead of apart. Because sometimes, the real challenge isn’t what someone does, but why they do it.
I was at a homeschool mom’s meetup recently (yes, I’m a homeschool mom), and I was listening to a lot of the fellow mothers talk about their past relationships and the things that were red flags to them, or simply annoyances. Over time, I started to see themes emerge specific to each mother’s Enneagram type….
Enneagram One – Fear of Becoming Unbalanced Ones are idealistic and driven, striving to live a life that is in perfect alignment with their values and principles. Ones live according to their ethics with a passion, always trying to control their lives so that they won’t deviate from their rules. Finding balance is a difficult…
Ping! New email. Text. Emoji wall. Hand gestures. Microexpressions. We communicate face-to-face, through pixels over the Web, and over the phone. Communication itself is repeatedly deemed as one of the most important skills of the 21st-century digital age, along with emotional intelligence. The Enneagram can help you have better conversations with others, in-person and through…
Do you ever feel like the things that really make you mad in a relationship are completely different than what triggers anger in your partner? Do you ever feel trapped, stiffled, stressed, put upon, ignored, or taken advantage of? What is triggering these feelings? Today I want to take a look at all of these…
One of the tools I’ve found most impactful in my coaching practice is the Enneagram. For those new to it, the Enneagram describes nine personality types, each with unique motivations, fears, and patterns of behavior. As a certified Enneagram coach, I’ve spent years diving deep into the nuances of these types, helping people to find…
Life has a way of throwing us some hard knocks now and then. In order to cope, we protect ourselves so we don’t feel that same gut-wrenching pain again. We all guard our hearts in different ways. Some of us build walls around ourselves to keep others out, others look for distraction, and others try…
Friendships are built on connection—but how we connect depends a lot on personality. The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI®) explains how we process the world: some friends need deep, philosophical discussions (hello, INTJs and INFJs), while others just want to go on spontaneous adventures (looking at you, ESFPs and ESTPs). Meanwhile, the Enneagram uncovers the why behind our behavior—why Type 6 friends need reassurance, why Type 8s come off blunt but are fiercely loyal, and why Type 4s want to be understood on a soul-deep level. When you mix these two systems, you get an incredibly nuanced look at friendship—why certain people click instantly, why misunderstandings happen, and how to nurture the relationships that matter most. Whether you’re trying to understand your extroverted bestie who never stops texting or your introverted friend who vanishes for weeks at a time, personality theory can help you bridge the gap.
Each enneagram type has something completely unique to bring to a friendship. Here’s a look at the strengths and weaknesses of each type as a friend. Let’s get started! Not sure what your enneagram type is? Take our new personality questionnaire here! The Enneagram Types as Friends The Enneagram One Friend Responsible and honest, One’s…
What are the qualities you wish for in a friend? Does your personality type have anything to do with it? Last week we explored the top things each of the types brings to a friendship, but what do they want in return? I was itching to see if people wanted the same things they bring…
Have you ever wondered what unique qualities you bring to your friendships? Your Myers-Briggs® personality type may give us some insights! Thanks to an enormous survey I conducted with over 85,000 individuals (and 5,002 respondents so far), we can gain some insights into this big question. Let’s take a look! Not sure what your personality…
Do you ever wonder why it’s easy or difficult for you to make friends but someone else you know has a completely different experience? As an INTJ myself, I’ve often struggled to try to make friends. I go through periods, in fact, where I primarily focus on work and responsibilities and forego friendships altogether. In…
As an INTJ woman, I have often experienced uncertainty and intimidation when it comes to the realm of female friendships. While I do know some other NT women who do not face the same struggle, I have noticed that many others do encounter similar challenges. Building and maintaining friendships can be challenging, particularly as an…
Friendship is something everyone needs in order to really be happy and content with life. Even the most reclusive introvert craves a confidante to share their thoughts and feelings with. But for some men, forming meaningful relationships can be exceptionally challenging. According to a recent 2021 survey of over 2,000 adults in the United States,…
Summer has arrived and with it are plans for outings, adventures, road trips, and more! Kids and young adults are getting a brief respite from school, old things are leaving our lives, and days are getting longer. And with more free time and more beautiful days in our calendar, we find ourselves looking for more…
Trying to steer clear of a friend who is driving you absolutely nuts? Then you’re welcome. In today’s article, we’ll explore the many ways you can evade the grasp of each Myers-Briggs® personality type. Keep in mind, this is a HUMOR article and is definitely not meant to be taken seriously. It relies on stereotypes,…
Finding friends seems like it should be easy. After all, we’re bombarded with social media apps that invite us to follow people, get in touch with old acquaintances, and say “Happy Birthday!” to people we haven’t met in decades. But even with all these advances in the world of technological relationships, many of us feel…
Dear INFJ, It’s an intimidating world out there. In a culture where connections are forged in non-traditional avenues like Twitter and Tinder, it can feel nearly impossible to form a friendship organically. Our world prizes confidence, boldness, and the perfect Instagram photo. INFJs, quieter and often prone to shyness (although not universally), can feel hesitant…
Thoughts Specifically for Introverted Personality Types
For introverts, friendship isn’t about quantity—it’s about depth. While extroverts may thrive in big social circles, introverts (think INFJs, INFPs, INTJs, ISTPs, etc.) crave fewer but more meaningful connections. The Myers-Briggs framework explains why some introverts need regular heart-to-hearts (hello, INFPs), while others prefer friendships that feel effortless, without the pressure to constantly engage (looking at you, ISTPs). The Enneagram adds another layer, revealing why some introverts (Type 5s, for example) need space to recharge, while others (Type 9s) might struggle with setting boundaries. If you’re an introvert, navigating friendships can be tricky—balancing alone time with connection, managing energy levels, and finding people who understand that silence isn’t awkward, it’s comfortable. The good news? The right friendships, ones that honor your personality, can be some of the most fulfilling and lasting relationships of your life.
What do INFJs need and want in relationships? Today we’re exploring some common struggles and joys these types face when trying to find “the one.” As an MBTI® practitioner, I’ve…
Are you an INTJ wondering what kinds of relationships will really be satisfying? I don’t consider myself a relationship expert, but one topic that continually comes up with personality research…
As an ISFP, relationships can sometimes feel complicated, especially when you’re trying to balance your desire for connection with your need for freedom and authenticity. I’ve worked with many ISFPs…
Being in a relationship with an INFP is like stepping into a world of dreams, emotions, and deep values. The world becomes bigger, your feelings become deeper, and you unlock…
When it comes to relationships, ISTPs have some intriguing qualities that may seem paradoxical to other types. On one hand, they are extremely independent – yet on the other, they…
ISFJs are some of the most naturally generous and caring individuals around. They are highly motivated to care for and defend their loved ones (hence their title “The Defender”). “It…
Coy. Gregarious. Vulnerable. Just kidding, that’s definitely not the INTJ’s flirting style. If your idea of being swept off your feet involves intellectual discussion deep into the early morning hours,…
The Flirting Style of the INTP Personality Type Do I have to address the robot in the room? Fine. If you like ‘em logical, skeptical, and willing to call you…
Today we’re going to take a look at the INFP flirting style – and on the way, we’ll hopefully de-bunk some of the stereotypes about this incredible type. The internet:…
INFJs are visionary, warm, supportive individuals with strong insights into human dynamics and relationships. You’d think this would make them masters at the art of seduction, right? Unfortunately, having insight…
ISTJs are competent individuals with a strong work ethic, a fun sense of humor, and a curious mind to boot. They are certainly interesting cookies. But how do they fare…
Today I’m going to talk about how ISFJs flirt. Am I really going there? Yes, dears. Most of us probably think flirting entails coy touches, smooth words, and general confidence…
Thoughts Specifically for Extroverted Personality Types
For extroverts, friendship is fuel. Whether it’s a buzzing group chat, a spontaneous weekend trip, or just having someone to share every random thought with, extroverts (ENFPs, ESFJs, ESTPs, ENTJs, etc.) thrive on connection. The Myers-Briggs® framework explains why some extroverts (like ENFPs and ESFPs) love making new friends everywhere they go, while others (like ENTJs and ESTJs) prefer tight-knit circles of ambitious, like-minded people. The Enneagram adds another layer, revealing why Type 7s bounce from friend to friend, always chasing the next thrill, while Type 2s pour their hearts into nurturing and supporting their inner circle. But even the most social extroverts have to navigate challenges—like respecting an introverted friend’s need for space or figuring out which friendships are truly meaningful versus just fun. The best part? When extroverts find their people, they bring energy, excitement, and unwavering loyalty to the friendships that matter most.
If you’re in a relationship with an ESFJ or you are an ESFJ, you’ve probably realized that relationships aren’t just important—they’re everything. As an MBTI® practitioner, I’ve had the honor…
Are you wondering if the ENTJ in your life is in love? Do you ever wonder how they really feel about you? This comes as no surprise! Relationships are confusing,…
Have you ever wondered what kind of person you’d be most compatible with? Do you notice people with four-letter codes (like INFJ or ESFP) posting on dating sites and wonder…
ENFPs, who I like to call “The Visionaries”, have a way of showing love that really stands out. Known for their imagination, enthusiasm, and idealism, ENFPs want to bring out…
When it comes to expressing and receiving love, not everyone speaks the same language. Do different Myers-Briggs® personality types have different ways of showing and receiving love? According to the…
If your idea of being wooed means having your soul excavated by the finest soul-miner around then you’re going to want an ENFJ. These types will dig through the trenches…
If your dream man or woman has the reflexes of Black Widow and the cleverness of Tony Stark you just might have a thing for ESTPs. These types are overflowing…
That internet troll who can’t help but start something up with you every two seconds is probably an ENTP. And oh, my golly gumdrops. They probably dig you. ENTPs are…
If ENFPs bring to mind unicorns and rainbows, you probably don’t know them well enough. Is this a hot take? We’ll see. ENFPs are often characterized online by their lively,…
Everyone needs an ESTJ in their life. I would know. I married one. ESTJs are often labeled domineering and blunt, with nothing but high expectations for everyone in their immediate…
