The Dream Date of Every Myers-Briggs® Personality Type

Picture this: you’ve finally gathered up the courage to ask your crush out on a date. You’re thinking dinner, maybe a movie, even some romantic stargazing. But hold up! Have you considered their Myers-Briggs® personality type?

Sure, you might have thought that bringing along a bouquet of roses would impress them, but what if they’re an INTJ? Those logical masterminds would probably prefer you bring a bouquet of scientific calculators. And that picnic under the stars you’ve planned? Brilliant, if your crush is an INFJ, suckers for cosmic meaning. But what about those daring ESTPs? They might be expecting you to whisk them off for a spot of midnight skydiving. Dating’s a minefield, and your understanding of personality might just save your romantic life from stepping on a metaphorical landmine.

Be aware, this article is meant for fun more than literal application. You’ll find some useful tips here, but take the stereotypes with a boulder of salt.

Not sure what your personality type is? Never fear! Take our personality questionnaire here. Or you can take the official Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI®) here.

The INFJ

For the INFJ, the ‘Idealist Counselor’ of the personality world, the dream date would be less ‘date’ and more ‘unplanned spiritual quest’. The INFJ’s idea of a good time isn’t your average candlelit dinner or a movie outing. Instead, imagine this: you’re blindfolded and led to an undisclosed location. Once you arrive, the blindfold is removed and you find yourself surrounded by ancient towering trees, the air fragrant with the scent of pine and earth. A calm river gurgles nearby, its water reflecting the moonlight.

Your INFJ date is standing nearby, wearing what can only be described as ‘Gandalf Chic’, complete with a staff. They begin to recite a self-authored poem about the soul’s journey through life. The poem lasts four uninterrupted hours. You’re offered homemade kombucha during a brief, but much-needed, intermission.

The conclusion of the poem is greeted with the profound silence of the wilderness. You’re expected to respond with your own self-reflective poem or, at the very least, a thorough exegetical analysis of theirs. As the date concludes, you walk away with the realization that you’ve not only dated, but you’ve also journeyed through the very essence of life and existence. Beat that, other personality types!

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an INFJ:

1. Learn to Speak their Language: INFJs communicate in a special dialect known as “Deep and Meaningful”, which includes phrases like “What’s your life’s purpose?” and “Isn’t the frailty of human existence fascinating?”. To connect with them, you’ll need to ditch your “How ’bout them sports teams?” starter pack and embrace their intricate lexicon.
2. Bring a Book: Got a favorite philosophical treatise or a heart-wrenching memoir? Bring it along. If there’s one thing an INFJ loves more than a deep conversation, it’s a deep reading. Plus, it gives you something to hide behind when the existential dread gets too much.
3. Embrace Silence: An INFJ can sit in silence for an eerily long time, contemplating the mysteries of life. Don’t be alarmed. They’re not bored; they’re just mentally composing their next magnum opus. Pro tip: A well-timed “Hmm, interesting” can work wonders.
4. Don’t Fear the Deep End: The INFJ pool has no shallow end. Be prepared to dive straight into discussions about life, death, and your most embarrassing moment in middle school. Leave the water wings at home; this isn’t the kiddie pool.
5. Smile and Nod: When the conversation veers into metaphysical territory or they start discussing the merits of various existentialist philosophers, don’t panic. Just smile and nod. It worked for your high school French class; it’ll work here too.
6. Be Real: INFJs have a sixth sense for inauthenticity. So, if you’re planning to impress them with your faux interest in Russian literature or your borrowed opinions on molecular gastronomy, think again. They can smell a faker from a mile away.
7. Practice Patience: Remember, you’re on INFJ time now. Things may move slower than a tortoise on tranquilizers as they analyze, process, and overanalyze every interaction. Be patient, bring a good book, and maybe a snack. You’re in for the long haul.

Find out more about INFJs: 24 Signs You’re an INFJ, the Mystic Personality Type

The INTJ

For the INTJ, the ‘Mastermind Architect’ of the personality lineup, their dream date scenario would probably give the average romantic comedy a run for its money. Imagine this: your date sends you the coordinates of your meeting place instead of an address, because “It’s more precise this way.” You arrive at an observatory, because where else would an INTJ hang out?

Awaiting you is your INTJ date, donning a blazer and a pair of glasses that would make Clark Kent proud. You’re led not to the observatory, oh no, but to an open field with a clear view of the night sky. Your INTJ date proceeds to launch into an unsolicited but meticulously detailed explanation of the universe, complete with hand-drawn diagrams and a laser pointer to pinpoint various celestial bodies. Then comes the discussion about artificial intelligence, because nothing says ‘romantic date’ like contemplating the ethical implications of sentient machines.

Throughout the evening, your INTJ date occasionally pauses, not for breath, but to give you a chance to interject with your own thoughts. They are, however, only half-expecting you to match their intellectual prowess. The other half is just hoping you’re not one of those people who think Pluto isn’t a planet.

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an INTJ:

1. Humor Them: When your INTJ date goes on a rant about the Higgs boson particle, don’t interrupt. Let them finish, then respond with a humorous comment about how it’s your second favorite particle, right after the neutrino.
2. Keep it Real: INTJs value rationality and honesty. If something goes over your head, admit it. Be yourself, and don’t be afraid to ask for a crash course in theoretical physics over dessert. Just don’t let them start on String Theory unless you’ve got a couple of hours to spare.
3. Talk About Your Interests: INTJs, surprisingly, do not exist solely on a diet of theoretical physics and existential dread. They also appreciate getting to know you and your world. So go ahead, tell them about your passion for creating miniature sculptures out of cheese. Just be ready for a thorough analysis of your chosen cheese’s molecular structure and a 10-point critique on your sculpting technique.
4. Appreciate Their Passion: When your INTJ date gets enthusiastic about a topic, let them enjoy their moment. Don’t yawn or check your watch. Nod along, ask questions, and try to keep up. They know their stuff, and who knows, you might learn something new.
5. Have a Sense of Humor: It’s not talked about much in the type community, but INTJs do actually have a sense of humor. It’s often as dry as a bone in the Sahara, and might require an advanced degree to understand, but it’s there. So, practice your chuckles, because if you manage to decode an INTJ joke, you’re in for a real (cerebral) treat.

Find out more about INTJs: 10 Things You Should Never Say to an INTJ

The ENFJ

For the ENFJ, the ‘Benevolent Mentor’ of the personality family, their dream date would probably be a scene straight from the Matrix, just with less leather and more feels. Picture this: your ENFJ counterpart invites you to meet them at a mysteriously named location “The Oracle” which, as it turns out, is just the most boho-chic coffee shop you’ve ever seen.

Welcome to the ENFJ’s world. Your date arrives fashionably late, dressed in a flowing ensemble that somehow manages to be both casual and dramatic. You’d be forgiven for confusing them with Morpheus, the difference being that instead of offering you a red or blue pill, the ENFJ offers you a choice between two artisanal, fair-trade, locally-sourced blends of coffee.

Their conversation style is a whirlwind of emotional depth and insightful observations about human nature, society, and that peculiar decoration on the coffee shop wall. You’re drawn in by their ability to connect, their intense level of empathy, and their uncanny knack for knowing exactly how you feel about the abstract painting on the cafe wall before you’ve even processed it yourself.

As the date progresses, you find yourself sharing your deepest fears, dreams and your ambiguous feelings about pineapple on pizza. This isn’t because they’ve mastered the art of casual interrogation, but because their emotional depth and insight make you feel understood, validated, and like you’re the most interesting person in the room.

Forget about the Matrix, with an ENFJ, you’ve entered a realm where emotions are not just deeply felt but also dissected, understood, and cherished. Just remember to keep up with their emotional pace and enjoy the rollercoaster, because with an ENFJ, there’s always another layer of emotional depth to explore.

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an ENFJ:

1. Express Yourself: ENFJs are like emotional sponges. They love hearing about your hopes, dreams, and your cat’s existential crisis. Don’t hold back. Tell them about the time you cried watching a detergent commercial. They’ll not only sympathize but also analyze the underlying themes of the advertisement with you.
2. Listen Actively: When your ENFJ date is sharing, don’t just nod and smile. Engage! Throw in an “Mmm-hmm” or an “Oh really?” here and there. If they’re discussing their passion for interpretive dance, now is not the time to bring up your favorite football team.
3. Embrace the Intensity: ENFJs have a flair for the theatrical. If they start acting out a scene from a movie or reciting poetry while staring deeply into your eyes, just go with it.
4. Be Open-Minded: Remember, ENFJs feel deeply about many things. One minute you could be discussing the socio-economic impact of climate change, the next, you’re delving into the psychological trauma experienced by Dobby the House Elf.
5. Remember, It’s Not a Therapy Session: Sure, ENFJs are great listeners and they love digging deep into emotions, but remember, this isn’t a therapy session. Try to balance the heavy stuff with some light-hearted banter. Maybe share your amusing theory about how seagulls are actually government drones. They’ll appreciate the change of pace!

Find out more about ENFJs: The ENFJ Personality Type and the Enneagram

The ENTJ

Now, let’s delve into the world of ENTJs. These folks are like the lovechild of Napoleon Bonaparte and Sun Tzu, reborn in the modern world with a Starbucks gold card. If you’re dating an ENTJ, be ready for a date that’s more strategy session than a romantic rendezvous.

Their dream date? Imagine an evening spent in an ancient war room (read: their tastefully minimalist living room), with a giant map spread out across a mahogany table. You’re huddled over a game of Risk, every move a testament to your tactical genius. The candlelight flickers, casting shadows on your intense faces, as the air thickens with the smell of impending victory… or defeat.

Picture this: Your ENTJ date, their eyes sparkling with excitement, hands gesticulating wildly, all while passionately elaborating on how Plato’s philosophy ties into their five-year plan. Their version of sweet nothings? Whispering ‘The Art of War’ quotes into your ear.

Expect the small talk to involve phrases like, “You don’t want to retire, right? Work is life!” or “Let’s discuss the philosophical implications of deep learning in AI.” And the ice breaker? “What’s your game plan for conquering the world?”

Remember, ENTJs are the strategic directors of the personality world. They are all about the long-game, insight, and of course, winning. So, keep your wits about you, and prepare to engage in a battle of brains where the spoils of war might just be their heart.

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an ENTJ:

1. Bring Your Strategic Mind: ENTJs respect strategy and a well-thought-out plan. If your idea of planning is deciding which Netflix show to binge, you might need to step up your game.
2. Embrace Debate: ENTJs love a good argument. Not the screaming and throwing dishes kind, but the intellectually stimulating, philosophical debate kind. Agree to disagree, but do it with flair.
3. Be Direct: Like our INTJ friends, ENTJs appreciate direct, no-nonsense communication. If you have something to say, say it. They’re not fans of guesswork in relationships.
4. Show Interest in Their Insights: ENTJs love sharing their strategic insights and philosophical musings. Show interest and engage in these discussions sincerely. It’s like brain candy to them.
5. Be Dependable: ENTJs have little tolerance for flakiness. If you say you’re going to do something, do it. In ENTJ land, reliability is sexy.

Find out more about ENTJs: How ENTJs Say “I Love You”

The INFP

Prepare yourself for the most romantic date of your life with the INFP, the personification of poetry, insight, and a pair of ears that could give a bat a run for its money. If Shakespeare and Dr. Frasier Crane had a love-child who was raised by Yoda, you’d get something close to an INFP.

Imagine this: Your INFP date picks you up in a car filled with wildflowers they foraged themselves from a hidden meadow that only they know about because they “felt a spiritual connection with the energy of the earth”. They’ll greet you with a soul-piercing gaze as if they’re diving into the very depths of your psyche, and then compliment the “multifaceted resonance of your aura”.

Your date venue? A hidden art exhibit in a secret forest clearing (discovered, of course, during their spiritual journey) showcasing the works of artists who only create during full moons. On route, expect a playlist that includes obscure Icelandic folk music, interspersed with them reciting their favorite Rumi verses.

Dinner? A picnic comprised of homemade vegan treats that align with the lunar cycle and the planet’s chakra, all lovingly assembled in a basket woven by the last remaining member of an ancient weaving society. Don’t be surprised when you’re asked to share your deepest fear, your greatest joy, and whether you think the moon is an introvert or an extrovert over a cup of fair-trade, ethically-sourced, matcha tea. Welcome to the world of an INFP date. This isn’t just a date, it’s an experience.

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an INFP:

1. Brush Up on Your Poetic Language: INFPs communicate in a language known as Metaphoria, where everything is symbolic and nothing is literal. If they say, “Your aura dances like a sunflower in the wind,” they’re probably saying they like your jacket. Maybe.
2. Be Genuine: INFPs have an in-built lie detector rivaling a polygraph machine. If you’re pretending to enjoy their 27-minute monologue on the spiritual significance of moss, they’ll know.
3. Be Open to the Unexpected: INFPs are like human lucky dips. One moment you’re discussing the weather, the next you’re acting out their favorite scenes from Harry Potter.
4. Respect Their Spaces: Do remember that INFPs treasure their personal space and solitude. If they want to take a moment to soak in the ambience of the secret forest clearing, let them. It’s not you, it’s them…just enjoying their ‘me’ time.
5. Learn the Art of Listening: Remember, your INFP date is a deep ocean of thoughts, feelings, and ideas. When they start sharing, practice active listening. This doesn’t just mean nodding along as they explain why they believe squirrels are the ultimate zen masters. No, you’ll need to engage, empathize, and maybe even shed a tear when they recount that heartbreaking time when Mr. Fluffington couldn’t climb the oak tree. In the realm of INFP, listening is not a skill, it’s a love language.

Find out more about INFPs: Are INFPs Empaths?

The INTP

Welcome to the world of the INTP, where the ultimate aphrodisiac is intellectual stimulation, and the route to their heart is paved with logical discussion and theoretical debates. If Socrates and Mr. Spock had a child, who was then babysat by Sherlock Holmes, you might just be on the right track.

Picture this: Your INTP date invites you to their abode, a sanctuary filled with a trove of books, intricate models of the human brain, and a whiteboard covered in mathematical equations that could make even Einstein scratch his head. They shyly avoid eye contact, focusing instead on their meticulously prepared PowerPoint presentation titled, “The Probability of Love in a Multiverse”.

As your eyes adjust to the stacks of complex quantum physics books and the low, ambient hum of a replica Star Wars lightsaber, you’re handed a cup of coffee, calculated to the precise temperature required for optimal taste and comfort. Your date then hits play on a vinyl record of the Jurassic Park soundtrack, because nothing says romance quite like the melodic strains of John Williams’ masterpieces and dinosaurs. Then, with a slightly awkward, yet endearing shy smile, they ask you your opinion on Schrodinger’s cat, and whether or not it might enjoy a saucer of milk in an alternate universe.

Just when you thought things couldn’t get more unique, your INTP date whips out a vintage Star Wars board game, neatly preserved in its original packaging. “This is a first edition, 1977 release,” they share with an almost childlike enthusiasm as they carefully set up the game. They’ll eagerly walk you through the intricacies of strategy, their face lighting up as they discuss everything from the socio-economic implications of the trade federation’s blockade on Naboo to the questionable physics of the Kessel Run. And in that moment, amidst the obscure references and endearing intellectual fervor, you might just discover the warmth that brews beneath that shy, analytical exterior of your INTP date.

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an INTP:

1. Join the Debate Club: INTPs love a good intellectual spar. You don’t need a PhD in Astrophysics, just show a willingness to engage in profound discussions.
2. Pack Your Decoder Ring: INTPs are masters of cryptic one-liners and abstract theories. If they say something like, “Your thoughts are like a Rubik’s cube in zero gravity,” they’re probably complimenting your complex thinking. Probably.
3. Appreciate the Quiet: If your INTP date is silent, they’re not bored—they’re probably just deep in thought about whether or not a zombie apocalypse could be a viable solution to overpopulation. Enjoy the silence and let their mind wander.
4. Become Fluent in Sarcasm: INTPs have a quirky sense of humor, often laced with a dash of cynicism and a sprinkle of irony. If they joke about planning a trip to Mars to escape reality TV shows, laugh along. They just might be half-serious.
5. Bring Your Curiosity: Ask your INTP date about their latest theories or obsessions, be it the intricacies of artificial intelligence or the implications of teleportation on peak-hour traffic. They’ll appreciate your interest and you might just learn something fascinating. Remember, in the world of an INTP, curiosity didn’t kill the cat—it teleported it to another dimension.

Find out more about INTPs: 10 Things You Should Never Say to an INTP

The ENFP

Welcome to the whimsical world of the ENFP, a place where every date feels like a crossover between a Pixar movie and a Cirque Du Soleil show. If Robin Williams and Mary Poppins had a child who was then mentored by Walt Disney, you might just be ready for an ENFP date.

Picture this: Your ENFP date greets you wearing a cape (which actually complements their outfit in a wonderfully eccentric way) and gives you a treasure map. “We’re going on an adventure!” they announce with a twinkle in their eye. You find yourself weaving through the city on a spontaneous scavenger hunt, following a trail of riddles leading to a pop-up carnival downtown.

Next, you’re joining them on a Ferris Wheel, discussing everything from their dream of starting a charity for stray pit bulls, to their theory that reality is just an elaborate musical and any moment the crowd below will break into a coordinated dance routine. They’ll be making you laugh one moment with their spot-on impersonation of Sir David Attenborough narrating the behavior of hipsters in their natural habitat, and inspiring you the next with their passionate plans to save the world, one pit bull puppy at a time.

As the evening wraps up, they surprise you with a candlelit picnic under the stars, complete with your favorite food, a playlist of songs that they think capture your essence, and a lively discussion on whether or not aliens would find human stand-up comedy amusing. So, buckle up! With an ENFP, every date is a rollercoaster ride where imagination fuels the engine, and fun is the only destination.

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an ENFP:

1. Embrace the Adventure: ENFPs are spontaneous and love to shake things up. If they suggest a midnight picnic at the zoo to watch the nocturnal animals, just go with it.
2. Be Authentic: ENFPs are human lie detectors and can spot a fake from a mile away. If you don’t know the difference between a latté and a cappuccino, don’t pretend that you do. They’ll appreciate your honesty.
3. Keep an Open Mind: ENFPs are wildly creative and love to bounce ideas around. So, if they suggest turning your living room into an indoor greenhouse or developing a reality show about the secret lives of librarians, don’t immediately dismiss it. After all, they might just be on to the next big thing.
4. Be Ready for Deep Conversations: Amidst all the fun, ENFPs are capable of profound insights and deep emotional connection. If they start discussing existential theories over cotton candy, go with the flow.
5. Remember the Little Things: ENFPs are deeply caring and love when their partners notice the little things about them. Recalling their favorite superhero or that they take their hot chocolate with vegan marshmallows will win you big points.

Find out more about ENFPs: The Flirting Style of the ENFP Personality Type

The ENTP

Welcome to the mind-bending, exhilarating, and slightly chaotic universe of dating an ENTP, where you’re as likely to debate the ethics of time travel as you are to actually attempt it. If Tony Stark and Sacha Baron Cohen decided to clone themselves and then send the clone to a debate camp run by Oscar Wilde, you’d get the ENTP personality type.

Imagine this: Your ENTP date picks you up in a self-designed, partly functioning flying car, their eyes gleaming with excitement as they explain the quantum mechanics behind it. Just as you start praying for a safe journey, your date veers off course, exclaiming, “Who needs roads when we have multidimensional wormholes!”

Next, you’re at an underground tech-meet, watching your date charm the room as they passionately argue that AI should have voting rights. Then, it’s off to a futuristic restaurant where the menu is in binary code, and your ENTP date expertly translates it before ordering your meals in fluent Python.

Suddenly, the evening turns into an impromptu Ted Talk as your ENTP date explains their latest invention – a smart toaster that not only can predict your preferred level of toast crispiness but also provides a daily existential question to ponder with your breakfast. And just when you think the night can’t get any more surreal, they pull out a pair of custom-made lightsabers and suggest a friendly duel to decide who picks up the check.

Navigating an ENTP date is like trying to figure out a Rubik’s cube blindfolded, while riding a rollercoaster, backwards. But, amidst the intellectual banter, the outlandish theories, and the mad scientist vibe, you’ll find a mind that’s as fascinating as it is unpredictable and a spirit that’s as fearless as it is funny.

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an ENTP:

1. Embrace Your Inner Nerd: If you’re planning on dating an ENTP, it’s time to let your geek flag fly.
2. Fasten Your Seatbelts: If spontaneity gives you hives, you might want to rethink dating an ENTP. With them, any evening could easily turn into a moonlit quest for Bigfoot or a pop-up debate at the local coffee shop. Remember: with an ENTP, the only predictable thing is their unpredictability.
3. Develop a Love for Argument: ENTPs have a knack for turning even the most casual conversations into a lively debate. But remember, the objective isn’t to win; it’s to engage in a stimulating intellectual joust.
4. Don’t Skimp on Praise: ENTPs, beneath their veneer of confidence and intellectual bravado, are really just overgrown kids who have swapped their colorful crayon drawings for theoretical physics equations and DIY rocket ships. They’re always eager to impress and love hearing how smart/attractive/ingenious they are, especially if said praise comes with a side of freshly baked cookies.
5. Always Be Open to New Ideas: If your ENTP date suggests turning your dining room into a planetarium or developing a Netflix series about the secret life of garden gnomes, don’t dismiss it outright. Instead, try to view it as an invitation into their world of boundless creativity and innovation. Who knows, you might just find yourself enjoying the view.

Explore more about ENTPs: 10 Things You Should Never Say to an ENTP

The ESFJ

Get ready to be swept off your feet, because an ESFJ on a mission to romance is a force to be reckoned with. This isn’t your average dinner-and-a-movie date. Oh no, an ESFJ plans dates the way NASA plans space missions – with precision, attention to detail, and not a hair out of place.

Your ESFJ date suggests a “casual evening out.” Considering their love for all things traditional and romantic, you might want to revise your definition of casual. The evening starts with a horse-drawn carriage ride through the city, with your ESFJ companion pointing out every landmark, recounting its history, and maybe even adding some trivia for good measure. They’ve obviously done their homework, or they’ve swallowed an encyclopedia. Both seem equally plausible.

For dinner, you’re whisked off to a restaurant so steeped in tradition and elegance that your jeans and t-shirt combo feels woefully underdressed. Your ESFJ date is in their element – a walking, talking Emily Post. They can tell the salad fork from the dessert fork, and they’ll even kindly correct the waiter who places the napkin on the wrong side of the plate.

The climax of your evening arrives in the form of a late-night stroll through a beautifully lit public garden. Here, your ESFJ date reveals their carefully curated playlist of timeless love songs, which they claim will “heighten the ambience”. And, like clockwork, they hand you a beautifully wrapped present at precisely 10 PM because, according to them, it’s “the optimal time for gift-giving according to ancient Roman beliefs”. Inside the box? A vintage pocket watch, meticulously restored to its former glory. Apparently, it’s a nod to your passing comment about your grandfather’s love for antique timepieces in your initial conversation.

As the night draws to a close, your ESFJ date, ever the romantic, escorts you to your doorstep. They lean in, not for a passionate, Hollywood-style kiss, but to fix the slightly skewed welcome mat outside your door with a chuckle and an approving nod. And then, with a gentle squeeze of your hand, they say goodnight, leaving you with a warmth that lingers long after they’ve gone. Their parting words, “I hope the watch keeps time as beautifully as our night went,” echo in your ears, a sweet end to a memorable date. You realize that in the world of an ESFJ, every detail matters – not because they’re pedantic, but because they genuinely care. Their actions, however small, speak volumes about their big heart, making you look forward to the next meticulously planned date.

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an ESFJ:

1. Bring a Magnifying Glass: ESFJs love details, so be prepared for the minutiae. If they mention the thread count in the restaurant’s tablecloth, or the exact hue of sunset at 7:16 PM, smile and nod. It’s not an obsession, it’s passion.
2. Remember Your Manners: ESFJs are the etiquette mavens of the dating world. If you’re unsure which fork to use, follow their lead. And if they pull out a ruler to check the alignment of your dessert spoon, just laugh it off—it’s all part of their charm.
3. Enjoy the Generosity: Be ready for surprises. If your date rents out an entire zoo just because you mentioned you like penguins once… well, that’s an ESFJ for you. Just remember to act surprised.
4. Bring an Emotional GPS: ESFJs are all about emotional connection. Don’t be surprised if they try to navigate the labyrinth of your feelings on the first date. All they want is to understand you better… or possibly write a psychological profile. Either way, it’s a clear sign they’re into you.
5. Be Down-to-Earth: While ESFJs can reach for the stars when it comes to planning dates, they appreciate a partner who is grounded, like them. Sometimes, the best way to balance out their ambitious date planning is to suggest a simple night in, with nothing but a good movie, microwave popcorn, and maybe a quick game of “Is this a salad fork or a dessert fork?” for good measure.

Discover more about ESFJs: The Flirting Style of the ESFJ Personality Type

The ESTJ

Brace yourself for a whirlwind because dating an ESTJ isn’t just a date. It’s a strategic operation. This isn’t about the butterflies in the stomach or candlelit romantic dinners. No, sir! This is about efficiency, function, and getting things done.

Your ESTJ date casually mentions spending “quality time” together. Knowing their penchant for structure and order, you ought to expect their version of “quality time” to be a little different from yours. The date begins with an invigorating early morning jog, setting the pace for the day. They’ll have you up at the crack of dawn, with your shoes laced and ready to clock in a good five miles before breakfast. Who needs sleep when you can have endorphins, right?

Breakfast itself is a hearty, efficient meal, designed for optimal nutrition intake. It’s not about the aesthetics or the ambiance. It’s about fueling your body for the day ahead, preferably with a side of bar charts denoting the protein and fiber content in your meal.

But wait, there’s more! After breakfast, you’ll be whisked off to a museum or a historical monument. Your ESTJ date will not only know every single fact about the place but might even correct the tour guide a couple of times. It’ll be like walking through a live documentary, with the ESTJ serving as the narrator, historian, and fact-checker all in one.

The date, of course, is punctuated with check-ins – ensuring you’re hydrated, comfortable and sufficiently educated. They might even have a feedback form for you to fill at the end, rating the various aspects of the date on a scale of one to ten.

As the sun sets, your ESTJ date will leave you with a detailed itinerary for the next date, because of course, they have already planned it out. In the world of an ESTJ, spontaneity is a bug, not a feature. The night ends not with a loose “see you around,” but with a firm handshake and a calendar invite for your next rendezvous.

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an ESTJ:

1. Embrace Efficiency: Being with an ESTJ means embracing the art of being efficient. If they plan a date to the library and the grocery store, don’t be surprised. It’s a two-for-one deal – romantic and practical. Remember, nothing says love like restocking the pantry together.
2. Bring a Notebook: An ESTJ loves sharing knowledge. So, when they start spewing historical facts or explaining the economic principles behind the stock market, it’s their way of expressing interest. Take notes – it’s not a lecture, it’s a love language.
3. Get a Planner: ESTJs love structure, so prepare to schedule your relationship. Your life might start looking like a well-organized spreadsheet, color-coded for maximum efficiency. Remember, every cell represents a moment of shared love and nothing says romance like a perfectly executed pivot table!
4. Master the Art of Delegation: An ESTJ is a natural leader, and sometimes, they just can’t help but take charge. Don’t take it personally if they delegate tasks to you on a date. It’s not about control, it’s about teamwork – you’re in this together, even if ‘this’ is figuring out the most efficient way to prepare a three-course dinner.
5. Honesty is the Best Policy: ESTJs appreciate the direct approach. If you’re not a morning person, say it. If you prefer Italian to Thai, speak up. They’ll appreciate your honesty, even if it messes up their spreadsheet. After all, they can always make a new one!

The ISFJ

Welcome, dear reader, to the magical world of the ISFJ’s dream date. Prepare to be enamored, because we’re embarking on a journey that’s as comforting as a grandma’s hug and as exciting as a 1940s radio drama.

Expect a date that starts with a handwritten note, not a text. And by handwritten note, we mean a beautifully calligraphed letter on parchment, sealed with wax. Emails are for savages, after all.

The day unfolds like a beautiful tapestry woven with the threads of tradition and romance. You’ll find yourself in a horse-drawn carriage, not a car, transported to a picturesque picnic spot that looks suspiciously like it’s been lifted straight out of a Jane Austen novel. And speaking of novels, don’t be surprised if they whip out a hardcover book to read aloud. Kindles, apparently, are also for savages.

The picnic basket, by the way, is a marvel of comfort food. There’s homemade chicken pot pie, warm apple pie, and a thermos with hot chocolate that’s just the right temperature. You can bet that the napkins have been folded into swans, and the sandwiches are cut into heart shapes. Why? Because for the ISFJ, every detail counts.

As the evening rolls in, expect to be led to a cozy log cabin, lit up with fairy lights, and warmed by a crackling fire. There’s no room for minimalism here. Every inch is covered in knick-knacks that spell homey comfort, from grandma’s crocheted throws to a vintage record player softly playing Frank Sinatra classics. And yes, they do expect you to slow dance.

As you leave, they’ll hand you a party favor – a beautifully wrapped homemade candle. Why? Because nothing says “I enjoyed our date” like beeswax scented with lavender they grew in their own garden.

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an ISFJ:

1. Time Travel is Key: To connect with an ISFJ, you may need to ditch modern conveniences like GPS and smartphones. Brush up on your sun navigation skills, dust off your quill and ink, and remember: The typewriter is the peak of technology in their world.
2. Become a Crafts Enthusiast: Get ready to enjoy long nights of knitting, origami, and making homemade candles. The more obscure the craft, the better. If you’ve ever wanted to learn how to weave your own throw rugs, now’s your chance.
3. Learn to Love Sentimentality: Be prepared to cherish every memento, from movie tickets to pebbles from that one time you walked near a beach. Their love language is ‘nostalgia’, and they treasure memories like a dragon hoards gold. If you still have the love letter you wrote in third grade, bring it along. They’ll love it!
4. Dust off your Etiquette: ISFJs value harmony and politeness, so you might want to brush up on your table manners and social etiquette. Remember to pass the salt and pepper together, always use your coaster, and for heaven’s sake, don’t chew with your mouth open. If you find yourself in a duel, remember: it is always pistols at dawn, and you are required to let your opponent choose their weapon first.
5. Have a Sense of Humor: Embrace your inner jest. A well-timed joke or witty pun can go a long way in winning the heart of an ISFJ. Just remember, while sarcasm and playful teasing might be accepted, mean humor is strictly off the table. After all, the only cutting an ISFJ appreciates involves artfully shearing garden hedges into the shapes of lovable woodland creatures!

Find out more about ISFJs: The Flirting Styles of the ISFJ Personality Type

The ISTJ

Prepare to be wooed by the ISTJ in a manner that puts even the most meticulous Swiss watch to shame. We’re talking about a date planned with military precision, so precise that even the ants marching in line would pause to take notes.

The ISTJ’s idea of a dream date? It starts with a schedule received a fortnight in advance. A schedule that would make seasoned project managers weep with joy, color-coded down to the minute, including scheduled times for hand-holding and a 5-minute window for a “spontaneous” laughter session.

Your date will begin at an orderly 7 PM sharp, but not a second earlier or later. Arriving fashionably late is not an option unless you wish to throw the ISTJ’s meticulously planned evening into chaos equivalent to a kitten stampede. Extra points if you bring a notepad to check off the planned events as they occur.

The romantic spot for the evening? A historical monument, of course! And not just any monument. Expect a tour of the city’s oldest post office. Why? Because nothing screams romance to an ISTJ quite like the smell of old stamps and an in-depth conversation about efficient mail sorting procedures.

Dinner will be at an old-school diner, the one that hasn’t updated its menu since the ’50s. Because, in the ISTJ’s world, if it ain’t broke, you don’t fix it. You’ll savor the stability of meatloaf and mashed potatoes as they wax nostalgic about the value of traditions and the good old days when milk was delivered to your doorstep.

And finally, the perfect ending to the perfect date for an ISTJ – a movie. But not just any movie, a black-and-white classic, most likely a romance where couples communicate their deep feelings through meaningful glances and grand gestures instead of, you know, talking about them.

As you part ways, you’ll receive a neatly typed summary of your date, complete with a list of points for improvement for the next one. Because for an ISTJ, there’s always room for efficiency improvements – even in matters of the heart.

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an ISTJ:

1. Respect the Schedule: The ISTJ’s schedule is sacred. Don’t mess with it unless you want to see an ISTJ in panic mode – and trust us, it’s not a pretty sight.
2. Embrace Nostalgia: Be ready to take a walk down memory lane, frequently. Their love for tradition and nostalgia runs deep. If you can appreciate a good “back in my day” story, you’re golden.
3. Have a Sense of Humor: Embrace the dry wit and subtle humor that comes with the ISTJ territory. While they may not be the life of the party, they’ll surprise you with their sharp one-liners and unexpected puns.
4. Pay Attention to Detail: ISTJs notice the little things. Show up with their favorite type of pen or remember a small detail they mentioned in passing, and you’ll win major brownie points. Just be sure it’s a brownie made according to the original recipe from 1897, please.
5. Get Ready to Be Surprised: Behind their serious demeanor, the ISTJ can be a real romantic at heart. They may not be the most expressive of partners, but they will surprise you with sweet gestures and unexpected gifts that show how much they care.

Find out more about ISTJs: 10 Things That Excite the ISTJ Personality Type

The ESFP

Get ready to party, because dating an ESFP is like being front row at a Beyoncé concert – energetic, captivating, and full of unexpected surprises. You won’t just be watching the show, you’ll be part of the performance.

Your date will likely kick off with a spontaneous road trip. Destination? Who needs one when you have a playlist of all the summer hits since 1990 and a car full of novelty props for impromptu roadside photoshoots? Just when you think you’ve reached your destination, they might spot a hot air balloon and decide it’s time for a quick detour to the clouds.

You’ll probably land in the middle of a music festival. Nothing screams ‘romance’ to an ESFP like dancing to a live band while adorned with glow-sticks and covered in biodegradable glitter. Expect to make at least a dozen new friends as your ESFP partner introduces you to every single person they lock eyes with.

Dinner won’t be at some stuffy restaurant. Oh no, you’ll be feasting on food truck tacos, eating candy floss, and sampling the world’s spiciest hot sauce at a stall run by a man named “Blazing Ben”. You are expected to take over the DJ booth at some point, even if you’ve never DJ’d before because, according to the ESFP, “it’s all about the vibes, not the skills”.

The perfect ending to an ESFP date? A surprise fireworks show that they’ve somehow arranged, despite the fact that it’s not a particularly special day or occasion. Why? Because every day is special when you’re with an ESFP.

As you part ways, don’t be surprised if they hand you a scrapbook (where did they even find the time to make that?), documenting every crazy moment of your date together. Because with an ESFP, not only do you get an adventure, you get a souvenir shop as well.

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an ESFP:

1. Embrace the Unexpected: Dating an ESFP is like jumping into a whirlwind with a party hat on. Be ready for anything and everything, from impromptu karaoke sessions to flash mob dance-offs in the middle of a supermarket. If you’re not up for the adventure, you may find yourself relegated to the role of official photographer.
2. Master the Art of Multitasking: Can you eat a cotton candy, do the Macarena, and participate in a spontaneous trivia quiz simultaneously? If not, you might want to start practicing now. ESFPs love juggling multiple fun activities at once and expect their partner to keep up.
3. Embrace the Social: ESFPs know everyone from the barista at the local coffee shop to the mayor of the city. They love people, and they want to share their world with you. If you’re more of a lone wolf, this might be a good time to learn some pack manners.
4. Learn to Love the Spotlight: When you’re with an ESFP, you’re not just on a date. You’re in a real-life romantic comedy where you both are the stars. So remember to smile, because you’re always on camera.
5. Be Authentic: ESFPs have a sixth sense for detecting pretense. So, unless your acting skills are in the league of Meryl Streep or Daniel Day-Lewis, it’s best to just be yourself.

Find out more about ESFPs: 10 Things ESFPs Look for in a Relationship

The ESTP

Next up, the ESTP, also known as the “doers” of the personality world. These adventurous souls are fueled by challenge, thrill, and a generous dose of humor. Brace yourself, because you’re about to embark on a date that’s a wild blend of ‘Fear Factor’, ‘Whose Line Is It Anyway?’, and ‘The Bachelor’.

Your ESTP date might invite you to join them for what they call a “laid-back Saturday.” In ESTP-speak, you’ll soon discover this translates to a heart-pounding race against the clock in a high-stakes escape room, where they’ll lead the team with the determination of a seasoned Navy SEAL.

Before the adrenaline even has a chance to fade, you’ll find yourself strapped into a harness, staring at the top of a rock climbing wall. As you hesitate, your ESTP date will flash you a grin full of bravado, shout something about “embracing the challenge,” and then scuttle up the wall with the nimbleness of a mountain goat. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to beat them to the top.

The dinner, of course, won’t be a quiet affair either. It’ll be a high-speed culinary journey through a bustling night market or a cooking competition where you’ll work together to create a mouthwatering feast from a secret box of ingredients. Don’t be surprised if your ESTP partner adds a dash of friendly rivalry to spice things up.

And just when you’re catching your breath and thinking the date is over, the ESTP will pull out tickets to an improv comedy show where they’re not just a spectator but a performer. Suddenly, you’re not only laughing at their lightning-quick wit but also becoming a part of their skit. The night ends with a romantic moonlight bike ride, where they stop to point out constellations, making up absurdly funny stories about each one, and somehow, in the midst of all the laughter and adventure, you find a shared connection.

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an ESTP:

1. Fasten Your Seatbelt: Being with an ESTP is like being strapped into a roller coaster ride that never ends. They thrive on thrill and adrenaline, so be prepared to match their zest for adventure.
2. Keep Up Your Improv Game: ESTPs are masters of thinking on their feet. They’re witty, spontaneous, and can turn the most mundane situation into a comedic masterpiece. For the ESTP, a sense of humor is not just an option, it’s a survival tool.
3. Get Competitive: Be ready to embrace a little friendly competition. Whether it’s rock climbing, a cooking showdown, or a game of chess in the park, ESTPs love a good challenge. It’s not about winning, it’s about pushing boundaries. Well, okay… sometimes it’s about winning.
4. Learn to Love Action: If your idea of excitement is a night in with Netflix, an ESTP might not be the best match for you. These personalities are all about doing rather than watching. So, swap the popcorn for a parachute and be ready for action!
5. Don’t Hide from Debate: ESTPs enjoy a good argument like a cat enjoys a laser pointer. They’re drawn to the chase, the feisty back-and-forth, and the mental gymnastics that come with a lively debate. And they’re good at it too. An ESTP can debate whether water is wet and somehow still have you questioning your stance by the end. They won’t just argue their point; they’ll argue your point, switch sides, argue some more, and then summarize the whole debate from an impartial third party’s perspective for good measure.

The ISFP

For the ISFP, you better be prepared for a date that feels like it was designed by the love-child of Bob Ross and Greta Thunberg, who was then homeschooled by David Attenborough.

Imagine this: Your ISFP date invites you to something they call a “simple Sunday afternoon”. In ISFP parlance, this translates to a relaxed picnic in a secluded spot of an enchanted forest. They’ve prepared a vegan spread that could make Gwyneth Paltrow weep with joy. As you dine on cruelty-free avocado toast and sip organic kombucha, you can’t help but appreciate the aesthetics of the moment – the way the sunlight filters through the leaves and the perfectly arranged picnic spread.

Then, just when you’re getting comfortable, your ISFP date whips out a sketchpad. No, they’re not about to start a casual sketch of the breathtaking landscape. Guess again. They want to draw YOU. Don’t worry, their artistic abilities probably rival those of da Vinci, so you’ll end up looking more like a Renaissance masterpiece than a stick figure.

Dinner won’t be an ordinary experience either. You’ll be led to a hidden gem of a restaurant, so secret it’s not even on Google Maps. You’ll enjoy a meal made from locally sourced organic ingredients that the ISFP lovingly describes to you, down to the name of the farmer who harvested the grains. The evening ends with a whispered conversation under the stars, sharing your dreams and fears, and somehow, in the ISFP’s quiet presence, you feel heard and understood like never before.

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an ISFP:

1. Embrace Your Inner Bob Ross: ISFPs are known for their creativity and appreciation for beauty. So, don’t be surprised if a typical date involves a paintbrush, a blank canvas, and a “happy little tree.” And remember, in the world of ISFPs, there are no mistakes, just happy accidents!
2. Don’t Underestimate the Quiet: They may not be the loudest in the room, but don’t let their quiet demeanor fool you. ISFPs harbor a wealth of deep thoughts and feelings.
3. Say Yes to Spontaneity: ISFPs go with the flow, so you have to be ready for last-minute plans and spontaneous adventures. It might be a midnight hike to watch the stars or a sudden road trip to chase the sunset. The key is to stay flexible and embrace the unexpected.
4. Have a Sense of Fun: Sure, ISFPs can be deep and introspective, but they also know how to let loose and enjoy the moment. So, whether it’s joining in a spontaneous dance-off or trying out a bizarre new snack, don’t forget to bring your sense of fun to the table.
5. Embrace Authenticity: ISFPs have an inbuilt authenticity detector that’s more accurate than any polygraph. You can’t fool an ISFP, and believe me, many have tried. Trying to be someone you’re not with an ISFP is like trying to convince a cat to act like a dog. You’ll end up looking ridiculous, and the cat (ISFP) will be profoundly unimpressed. So, drop the pretense and just be you

Find out more about ISFPs: How ISFPs Say “I Love You”

The ISTP

Fasten your seatbelts, guys, because dating an ISTP is like being thrown into a scene from ‘Indiana Jones’ – if Indiana liked to spend half his time tinkering alone in a workshop. You may think you’re signing up for a quiet night in – but in the world of the ISTP, that translates to something quite different.

Your ISTP might describe the plan as a “low-key Saturday.” And while you might be expecting a cozy movie night, your ISTP date has other ideas. This involves you finding yourself in a dimly lit workshop, the smell of iron and oil wafting through the air, and your ISTP date enthusiastically explaining the intricate workings of a 14th-century trebuchet they’re restoring. Yes, you heard that right. A trebuchet. You can’t quite fathom how you’ve gone from expecting a rom-com to discussing medieval siege weaponry. But hey, it’s all part of the adventure!

Dinner, of course, won’t be your typical affair. You’ll find yourself around a campfire, roasting marshmallows and listening to the ISTP’s tales of their solo wilderness adventures. Your date will weave stories of surviving on wild berries, fixing a broken compass, and the one time they almost befriended a grizzly bear. All the while, you’re trying to remember if you have any tales of daring that don’t involve a battle with a particularly tough jar of pickles.

And just when you think the date is winding down, your ISTP date will pull out an old treasure map, and suddenly you’re on a moonlit quest for buried treasure, complete with a metal detector and a pair of shovels. As you navigate the terrain, your date will offer you a “penny for your thoughts” and in the silence of the night and the thrill of the hunt, you realize you’ve stumbled upon a connection deeper than any treasure you might find.

Real Practical Tips for Connecting with an ISTP:

1. Embrace Your Inner MacGyver: ISTPs love to fix things. So, if you’ve got a broken toaster gathering dust in your pantry, bring it along as your date’s accessory.
2. Enjoy Your Alone Time: Ever wished you could get some alone time during a date? Well, you’re in luck! You might often find your ISTP date engrossed in their project while you’re around. Don’t take it personally; it’s their way of recharging. So, grab a book, enjoy your coffee, and appreciate the sound of silence.
3. Say Yes to Adventure: Your ISTP date is likely to suggest an impromptu rock climbing session instead of the usual candlelit dinner. Embrace it! Remember, safety harnesses are far sexier when viewed through the thrill-seeking eyes of an ISTP.
4. Keep it Real: ISTPs are all about facts and logic. So, if you’re contemplating weaving an elaborate tale about being the reigning monarch of a small island nation, think again.
5. Have a Sense of Humor: ISTPs don’t take life too seriously and neither should you when you’re with them. Be prepared to enjoy the lighter side of life, from impromptu pun competitions to playful debates.

Discover more about ISTPs: 10 Things ISTPs Look for in a Relationship

What Are Your Thoughts?

Yes, I know this article was rife with stereotypes. But let’s face it, who doesn’t love a good pigeonhole every now and then? It’s like a cozy little nest where we can cuddle up with our preconceived notions.

But remember, underneath these fun caricatures, we’re all a complex mix of traits and tendencies that can’t be wholly boxed into sixteen neat categories. So, whether you’re an INFP seeking a deep connection or an ESTJ looking for a plan, remember that the best date is one where you can express your authentic self. It’s about finding someone who appreciates you for you, understands your quirks, and joins you in your unique journey of life. So, whatever your personality type may be, whether you’re a fan of trebuchets, paintbrushes, or rock climbing, just remember to embrace your personality and let it shine. After all, it’s the uniqueness that makes us truly fascinating.

Discover more about your personality type in our eBooks, Discovering You: Unlocking the Power of Personality Type, The INFJ – Understanding the Mystic, The INTJ – Understanding the Strategist, and The INFP – Understanding the Dreamer. You can also connect with me via Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter!

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