The Surprising Contradiction of Each Enneagram Type

Do you ever feel like there are two competing sides of yourself that are constantly at war with each other? I know I do. Maybe that sounds weird, but it’s true. As an Enneagram Four I want to have deep connections with people who see me for who I truly am, but then when I’m with people I feel I have to play a part to fit in.

All of us have interesting contradictions about our personalities. Some of these contradictions have nothing to do with the Enneagram, but some do. Some of us have grown out our contradictions, while others are still entrenched in them. Today we’re going to explore the surprising contradictions of each of the nine Enneagram types. What’s something that creates inner discord or confusion within you? Let’s find out!

Not sure what your Enneagram type is? Take our free questionnaire here

The Body Types: Enneagram 8, 9, and 1

Enneagram Type 8 – The Challenger

Type 8s reject any sign of weakness in themselves or others. They push hard and expect everyone around them to do the same. Eights see the world around them as harsh and competitive, and weakness will get them nowhere. But here’s the twist—they get fiercely protective and enraged when they see others hurting the weak. It’s as if their disdain for weakness flips into a protective rage, making them defenders of the very thing they typically look down on.

Find out more about Eights: 10 Things Enneagram 8s Need in Relationships

Enneagram Type 9 – The Peacemaker

Type 9s are laid-back and go with the flow while simultaneously being incredibly stubborn. They have ideal, internal worlds that they escape to, and because they’re so happy there, they tend to avoid asserting themselves in real life. They’ll go along with others’ plans and let their friends, parents, or partners take the lead. That is, until those plans interfere with their inner worlds. Then, watch out—they dig their heels in and won’t budge. Nines may seem easy-going, but they’re immovably stubborn when it comes to the inner peace and sanctuary of their individual world. If you try to invade that with too many external demands, be prepared for some serious defiance in the form of passive-aggression, silent treatment, or outright refusal.

Discover more about Nines: Enneagram 9 – The Peacemaker

Enneagram Type 1 – The Perfectionist

Ones are all about being above reproach and doing everything they can to avoid criticism or being “bad.” They hold themselves to high standards and expect the same from others. This often leads to workaholism, perfectionism, and a highly structured, regimented lifestyle. Yet, Ones are often surprised and annoyed when their own criticisms to others aren’t well-received. It’s a contradiction of wanting to be perfect and beyond fault, while not understanding why others don’t appreciate their “helpful” corrections.

Discover more about Ones: Escaping the Trap of Resentment for Enneagram Ones

The Heart Types: Enneagram 2, 3, and 4

Enneagram Type 2 – The Helper

Type 2s want to be everyone’s go-to person. They love being needed and tend to help others while not asking for help in return. But here’s the plot twist—when they’re actually needed, they can feel overwhelmed and resentful. They typically won’t say anything about it, but the feeling is there all the same. It’s like, “Wait, I wanted to help, but this is too much!” They also deal with the nagging worry that people only love them because they’re helpful. That’s a tough spot to be in, constantly juggling between wanting to be indispensable and feeling trapped by that very need.

Find out more about Twos: 10 Signs of an Unhealthy Enneagram 2

Enneagram Type 3 – The Achiever

Type 3s want to be loved for who they truly are. Yet they feel compelled to craft the “perfect” image so that others will like or admire them. This usually started in childhood when they noticed they got “love” or approval from performing well. At average to unhealthy levels, Threes create a polished persona to gain admiration. They tweak their image to be seen in the best light, which can trap them in a cycle of inauthenticity. It’s a catch-22—they crave genuine love but believe they feel they need to project a certain image to earn it.

Find out more about Threes: Escaping the Trap of Vanity for Enneagram 3s

Enneagram Type 4 – The Individualist

Type 4s crave authenticity. They want to be seen for who they truly are. But at the same time, they have a specific image in mind of how they should be publicly. “I need to be 100% genuine, but I also need to be seen as a talented artist who wears thrift store, vintage clothing”. You get the idea. You can’t be completely authentic if you’re always tweaking your image to fit a mold. It’s a complex dance between showing your true self and controlling your outward persona.

Find out more about Fours: The Enneagram 4 Individualist

The Head Types: Enneagram 5, 6, and 7

Enneagram Type 5 – The Investigator

Type 5s are all about gathering knowledge and planning. They have dreams of putting all that info to good use and getting out there and taking on the world – they see themselves as the kind of people who will do just that. However, when it’s time to take action, they often retreat back into planning mode. It’s like, “I want to conquer the world, but maybe I need to read one more book first.”

Discover more about Fives: The Enneagram 5 Investigator

Enneagram Type 6 – The Loyalist

Type 6s have a deep desire for independence but also seek out authority, community, and guidance. They feel safe when they have rules and philosophies to live by, but at the same time they’re fiercely skeptical of rules and authorities and philosophies. They can be simultaneously rebellious and authority-seeking at the same time. Who says you can’t have both, right?

Find out more about Sixes: The Enneagram Six Child

Enneagram Type 7 – The Enthusiast

Type 7s are all about chasing fun and adventure, fearing the idea of missing out. They’re constantly on the hunt for excitement, but in avoiding discomfort, they often get caught in endless distractions that prevent them from truly enjoying life. It’s like they’re on a never-ending rollercoaster—while they think they’re having a blast, true satisfaction slips away. Instead of confronting their anxieties, they dive into a whirlwind of activities, missing the peace that comes from slowing down and processing.

Find out more about Sevens: The Enneagram 7 Child

What Do You Think?

Do you relate to your contradiction, or have you grown past it? Do you have any suggestions for readers about how to cope? Let us know in the comments!

You can also take our  enneagram questionnaire here if you’re not sure which type fits you best.

References:

The Honest Enneagram by Sarajane Case (Andrews McMeel Publishing, 2020)

Discovering Your Personality Type: The Essential Introduction to the Enneagram, Revised and Expanded by Don Richard Riso and Russ Hudson (HarperOne, 2003)